Supporting a friend through miscarriage

Anonymous

Supporting a friend through miscarriage

Need advice

My close friend and I found out that we were pregnant at the same time (she’s was a couple of weeks ahead), both still in the early stages. A year ago around this time, she had a miscarriage and it took a while for her to get back on her feet to try again (she has two little ones but they want a third to complete their family). Unfortunately, she had a viability / dating scan recently, and there was no heartbeat. She is devastated and once again believes the year she thought she was going to have has been destroyed. I understand at this point they want their space to grieve and don’t want to talk. I have made sure she knows that I am here for her when she’s ready.

I’m just a little worried how she will interact with me moving forward too. I am also still in my early stages and have had complications of my own during this pregnancy (spotting etc, I’m on medication and the last two weeks has been hell for us). But on one hand if all goes well moving forward, I’m worried what her reaction to me would be. Sometimes, without her realising it, she can make some hurtful comments. I don’t want her to distance herself from me either and always look down on the situation that we would have shared the experience together. I would have loved for this to have happened, but on one hand we have to stay positive for ourselves too.

I don’t know what I am saying but has anyone been in a similar experience with a close friend? When she’s ready I am here to lend a shoulder and support her, but what are the best ways to offer her comfort but also encourage her that there is still hope?

Posted in:  Relationships & Marriage, Pregnancy

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