Hi ladies I need some help. My step son is almost 15 now and I know that's a moody age already, but he and my husband are just not getting along. I mean there aren't arguments, but ss is sulky and moody and won't talk to us. Spends most of his time on his phone texting his friends or shut away in his room. Hubby has has enough. Ss has never been able to make his own decisions and would rather just miss out on doing something than actually make a decision because he seems so afraid of making a mistake. Hubby is not full on with him and we do not make him feel bad if he makes a mistake.
Hubby however has had enough and said tonight it's getting so bad he thinks if ss is so desperate not to be here he may as well go live with his mum! Getting them to just talk to each other is impossible ss just says there's nothing wrong.
Father and son relationship
Father and son relationship
Posted in:
Men's Business, Being a Dad, Relationships, Teenagers, Tips and Advice
4 Replies
Sounds pretty normal for 15 year old boys. What does his mum say is going on? Has it occurred to you both that this goes on with mum too? Do ss and your hubby ever do anything cool just together?
Seriously at that age the last thing I wanted to do was spend time with my parents and pretty much spent most of my weekends out with his friends. Is he missing out on friend activities when he is with you?
It's more than that now, he spends his time texting his mum back and forth telling her he misses her can't wait to be home etc. it's breaking my husbands heart! We've tried to encourage him to go out to friends places, he'd rather stay home on the xbox chatting over the head sets. They tried going out doing stuff together but he always finds hubby's options boring and will never make a decision on what he wants to do...
Ss bio mum walked out on both of them when he was little, hubby had sole care for those few years. When at his mums he has to take responsibility for himself and wake her up in the morning and do his own lunches yet here we ensure he doesn't have to do any of that as we think it's our responsibility. My hubby has done everything he can to try and be a decent parent yet he's being practically slapped in the face :(
Sounds like me as 15 yr old unfortunately. ): just something you have to go through. Nothing my parents did at that point made it easier...and I had great parents who were still married so can't imagine been from a split home. Just tell him to hang in there and stay positive as much as possible. Don't let him give up home on the relationship. Maybe just tell your step son (or get your hubby to do it) tell him that you love him and want to spend time with him, but you don't want him to feel obligated to been here. Is it a possibility that his mum is bad mouthing you guys?
Just guessing here, as I don't have teenage boys. But my sister has a nearly 15yo boy and texting and shutting himself away seems to be a pretty common passtime! They are lucky enough to have a good relationship with him though, and I believe it has a lot to do with each parent spending individual time with him. His dad gets on the Play Station with him a lot (sigh! but it has given them lots of fun times together!) and he and his mum get up early on a Sunday sometimes and head up their local hill walk to see if they can beat their fastest time. So as much as it pains me, my suggestion is to invest in some gaming equipment and get your husband into it haha. Or even better, invest in something more active like mountain bikes. Or whatever would be cool enough to entice a 15yo boy away from his phone and spend some time with the family! Good luck :)