My step daughter (14) has just found out via snooping (yes bad choice of hers) that her mother has gotten engaged.
Back story: she came to live with us this May due to a lot of bad issues including a sad relationship with her mother. They have limited contact due to rebuilding my daughters emotional well being and self esteem. Her mother thought her way to communicate with her was to get a solicitor to demand her to speak with her. Since then we have gotten her to ring her mother and also write to her to get the communication going. Each time it's been my daughter initating the contact. No effort from her mother since August.
So today she snooped into her mothers fb to find out if she is even getting thought of. I think she just wanted to feel some loving maybe see what's happening with her brothers? She read that 4 months ago her mother got engaged and she still hasn't been told, she is understandable upset.
How do I help her with this?
Thanks in advance.
Step Daughter not being told about her mothers engagement
Step Daughter not being told about her mothers engagement
Posted in:
Teenagers, Tips and Advice, FAQ
2 Replies
Be there for her, acknowledge her feelings, tell her it's not something she did, that it's about her mother. That doesn't mean you bag her mother out but you can acknowledge that her mother handled it incorrectly for whatever reason. Just listen and let her know that you all love her.
Just support her and remind her that shes loved constantly. Maybe the mum is acting out over her no longer living with her. I went to live with my dad when i was 15. Mainly cause i wanted to get to know him, but also cause i was sick of fighting with my mum. Bad idea i still need counsellinf from that year from hell! Im now 36, & 2 years ago mum & I had a huge fight, she accused me of leaving her and hating her. I had no idea!! I only went for a year, pretty childish way to act out though! Poor thing must be crushed, no matter how bad our parents are we always want them to want us and to love us.