Feeling overwhelmed after loss of my father

Anonymous

Feeling overwhelmed after loss of my father

I need to vent more than ask a specific question. I lost my dad in February and its been a roller coaster ever since. I am the only 1 of 4 kids in the same city as Mum so naturally it has fallen to me to do everything. When it came to the funeral and all the following arrangements the others were here and did what they could but now mum has to move house and its been left up to me to pack up the house and all that. My brother and sister live 2.5 hrs away and my other brother is a plane ride away. I hate that I've been left with the pressure of this! I have 4 kids that need my attention, and my husband has been wonderful but I have such a huge job left to do in just 2 more days! My mum has been coping okay, but understandably has not been able to do heaps. And I've had to just wait to do a lot of packing as she hasn't been ready. I cry every day because I'm packing up their lives, he should have been here longer. This wasn't the way it should have been! And now I have to do it alone :(

Posted in:  Self Care, Loss & Grief

2 Replies

Anonymous

I'm so sorry for your loss.
I know first hand how very hard it can get as my mum passed away in January this year and then one of my best friends lost her battle to cancer & passed away in February. So sending hugs your way, it's not a nice feeling to lose a loved one and then be left to pick up the pieces.
It's good that your talking about it on this page as it will feel like a weights been lifted just been able to speak to someone about your feelings.
Can any of your siblings come down to help out?! Do I have any friends who wouldn't mind lending a hand. ?

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Anonymous

It's shocking isn't it. We're in the same boat. 4 of us, we lost Dad suddenly & far too young. However most of the paperwork has fallen to my sister which I think is incredibly unfair. Luckily we haven't had to move Mum yet but quite frankly your siblings distance isn't an excuse. Ultimately though I think you should hire professionals & the cost can come out of the estate. There are organisations to pack, clean & move house even throw out all your rubbish. It's not up to you to do everything nor should it be. Hire the help & get it done stress free. Worth the money I think. If it's getting too hard get on the phone & tell your siblings. They can take time off & travel, they'd have to if you weren't there.

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