I understand the simple answer is stop, but I'm not sure how...
My husband and I have three young children, we have a business, a house, two vehicles and I study. We don't have any 'toys' like boats or motorbikes but we do have an above our means daily lifestyle. I buy clothing for each of us whenever I see something I like, he buys things he wants whenever he thinks of it. I go out for coffee almost daily and always buy a snack or meal too, the kids always get a drink too. My husband buys lunch most days because anything packed from home doesn't stay fresh, we eat take out whenever I couldn't be bothered cooking (good take out not fast food, so not cheap) and we often go out for lunch/ breakfast/ dinner multiple times a weekend.
My problem is we used to comfortably afford this however 6 months ago my husband left his mining industry job to begin his own company and so now we actually can't, but neither of us can adjust. We stupidly purchased a brand new company vehicle immediately which in hindsight was ridiculous and is now eating 110% of company profits, however to sell it would be pointless and we won't regain all of the purchase price since it was brand new.
My main issue is we have no savings and I see our credit card creeping up. My husband is so stressed with work I hate the feeling of throwing this on him too. On top of it I know he doesn't understand the extent of our comfortable living as its never been something we had to think about so I know he will get worked up when he sees dollar amounts.
I guess my question is, has anyone heard of/ is there such a thing as perhaps an online challenge/ blog/ book for adjusting your way of life? Of downgrading/ downsizing your spending?
Extravagant daily living..
Extravagant daily living..
Posted in:
Life Lessons, Relationships & Marriage, Health & Wellbeing, Money, FAQ
4 Replies
Cut credit cards up! They're evil. Only use money you have in your bank account.
Shop with cash. Start meal planning and only shop for what's on your list. Go to the bank and get not much more money out than groceries would cost.
Leave cards at home. Can't spend if you don't have access to it.
Start consciously thinking "I can't afford this. I don't NEED this!.
Set yourself the challenge of only having one day a week where you eat takeaway. That includes breakfast, coffee and cake, lunch, dinner.
And your husband needs to stop with the "lunch doesn't stay fresh" crap.
Buy a crib bag (can get massive lunch bags with ice bricks) for $20-$40 from Bunnings.
Keeps my partners lunch fresh all day.
Take leftovers for lunch.
Stop buying the kids drinks and snacks when out.
Pack their drink bottles in your purse and fill them with water/cordial from home.
Take a snack from home too.
They can eat/drink those or get nothing.
My partner is in the mining industry, we have plenty of money, but I still shop and live frugally.
We've got over $70,000 in the bank, saved in 4 years, and that's with many holidays/trips in that time too.
It can be done!
Cut up yourcard make a budget so youre spending real money. Youll soon realize how hardit is to come up with.
If you keep spending on credit like its not real youll end up in a big hole. You know you need to stopso stop.
You guys need to jump on this right now before you get one more dollar in debt because the deeper you get the harder to dig back out. I know it's easier for me, I live in regional QLD and "the shops" here consist of some cafes, supermarkets, servos and chemists plus 2 op shops lol, but seriously, if the temptation is being where you can buy clothes, don't go there. Share all of this with your husband, you cannot be frugal and he is wasteful, it won't work and he needs to know where the finances sit so he can also adjust. Coffee out is nice but it's not necessary, buy a travel mug if you like coffee on the go and if it's more the outing than the coffee, go to a park for a walk with the kids instead and take some water bottles. It's easy to not want to cook, I get it but it's not economical to pay someone else to do it for you. Look online, there's heaps of resources for recipes/cooking and I particularly like cooking something with enough leftovers for lunch tomorrow. Slow cookers, frozen meal prep etc, lots of options for food. Fair enough we have a fridge at work but if not a small esky and some ice bricks will do the job just fine. Now there's even those cookers that either plug in via usb to warm or sit in the sun and cook with power from the sun so there's no excuse really. Anytime I don't have leftovers for lunch I make a salad and take a tin of tuna. Even with the means to purchase what I want, I sit on big purchases for at least 48 hours. If I still want it after 48 hours I get it, usually I've talked myself out of it. I know there are some blogs pages etc as i've read some, look for things like how to live frugally. You don't have to be as extreme as many of them are but it teaches you to be more mindful.
I thought about this on and off for a few days haha. I thought it was a little bit silly to continue to blatantly put your future and the future of your kid’s welfare at risk by ending up bankrupt. I know bankrupt people and I know that people can end up homeless due to bad choices. So sorry to be blunt but get a grip. I agree with all the advice of the other commenters, especially the bit about the car. Sure you won’t get the value back but if it is truly 110% of the profits – you need to recoup some of your losses and fast and this will be the easiest thing give you some space to breathe. Don’t buy a shit box though – they just break down and then you end up with added bills – go in the middle – get something you can afford after seeing a financial advisor who can tell you how much you should spend.
I go out with the kids, I like to buy coffee but the biggest spend is mostly the drinks – I’m not sure why establishments charge so much for drinks but they do…. Take some drinks – buy some drink bottles – and take some snacks – zip lock bags are great, fruit is great, all chips and rice crackers come in single serves – chuck them in, buy some supermarkets muffins if that’s your thing and you don’t like to bake. I like to put ice in my drink bottles so they are cold. I also buy just juice poppers and stick a few in the freezer to use as bricks in my cooler bag and then they are nice cold poppers later should the kids catch me unexpectedly and want another. Buy your coffee from a drive through then go to a park and drink your coffee and give them a popper lol. Multiple weekends lunches and breakfasts? It’s not about just stopping – it’s about taking responsibility for yourselves and understanding that you can still go out – just not multiple times. Being too tired to cook… I get that. We do takeout for those reasons too. I like good takeaway too but I also know that all takeaway is still takeaway – it’s still nowhere near as good as home cooking and besides you can spend $60 on KFC now days so it doesn’t even have to be fancy to be pricey. If I don’t plan my dinners for the week – we end up buying out more – plan your week. Put a lasagne or whatever in the freezer for the lazy days or the days where you can’t be stuffed thinking of what to cook. My go to lazy dinners is home made two minute noodles, chicken wraps and oven dinner’s i.e. chicken schnitzel and chips and salad or veg – stick it in the oven and bobs your uncle. Picnics, BBQs at home with a blow up pool all good effortless ways to feel like your out without being out. As for the clothes - lucky you. You will look nice when you file for bankruptcy. Have a garage sale or take pics and sell what you don't wear online and reinvest any money you make into new clothes only. Just a thought - I know I being mean but I'm also being constructive so I think I can get away with it.
As for blogs and challenges etc. – I just typed “how to cut your spending” into google and a tonne of crap came up. Good luck Sista. You’ll be ok