My 8yr old who I have written recently about having issues with her hating the way she looks and has anxiety. She has been seeing a councellor who is helping.
But the councellor has mentioned in passing that she has noticed that she has some autistic traits. (Prefers adult conversation, very touchy feely, fidgets, needs to know every detail about everything) I some what agreed and asked if she thinks I should get her accessed and she said it's very mild not to bother as it would probably do more harm then good with the way my daughter is because she worries and gets anxiety when she thinks something is different about her to someone else and she is past the early intervention stage.
No one has never mentioned anything before. She isn't struggling academically at school and isn't naughty at home. No melt downs and She wouldn't hurt a fly. But has major issues when it comes to social interaction and has anxiety.
I seen a lot of articles lately about how girls with autism are totally different to boys and they rarely get diagnoses or diagnosed late which leads to anxiety and depression.
Has anyone had a daughter similar to mine and has been formally diagnosed this late
Has it helped or shouldn't I bother because we are already seeing someone about the issues that she are struggling with.
8yr old and councellor has mentioned she has some Autistic traits.
8yr old and councellor has mentioned she has some Autistic traits.
Posted in:
Mental Health, Parenthood Guilt, Behaviour, Kids, Aspergers & Autism
8 Replies
I'd get her diagnosed. It will be an explanation to her as to why she is feeling different and she can find mechanisms to cope with the help of a good doctor :)
I am your daughter.
I always knew I was different. High anxiety, trouble with social issues, was quite good at school etc. However I always knew I was different, no matter how hard I tried I just didn't fit.
Had a number of emotional breakdowns in my late teens, 20s and 30s.
I wasn't diagnosed until my 30s. I wish I'd had the diagnosis a lot earlier.
I don't think you should rule out getting a diagnosis. I think it will close doors to your daughter that she might need opened. Such as social networks of autism giris, like The Yellow Lady Bugs. It can be a huge relief to find people who think like you.
Personally I'd be seeking advice from a psychologist who specialises in Autism. There are ways to do the diagnosis that are therapeutic. It's pretty much a questoinarre and the psychologist doing play activities with your daughter.
Either way I'd be getting a second opinion. As general consensus is we benefit from knowing there is a name for our difference, because we have felt different our entire lives.
Who on earth would say not to bother looking into it?!! Ive also seen that girls with asd have higher rates of being misdiagnosed with anxiety, bipolar, personality disorders and eating disorders. It wont make sense until you have the right diagnosis. And with her already having these issues... yes, its worth it!!!!
I had a friend in school who was so obviously autistic but her parents refused to acknowledge it. I was recently talking to her and she told me she got herself diagnosed at 29 years old because her whole adult life has been extremely difficult for her and she resents her parents for not doing anything for her when she was younger. They still now refuse to acknowledge it and their relationship is strained.
But now that she knows she's getting the help she needs and things are looking up for her.
I'd definitely get your daughter diagnosed.
My DD is 6 years old.
She has an acquired brain injury, however, has ALOT of austistic traits...to the point her behaviour specialist and speech pathologist has questioned if we have got her diagnosed for autism...
We have brought this up with the paedititrician and he was more than happy to go through the process of diagnosing her, but at that stage we weren't 100%.
Since then we have made the choice to go through with it, as it's becoming more apparent...
I think the diagnose early will help you and her gain the life skills she needs for when she gets older 😀
In short, yes. Our daughter is the same. The school wanted to test her for giftedness. We are about to see a psychologist in Qld named Tania A. Marshall. She specialises in women and girls with Asperger's as well as other issues (anxiety etc). Like you, we decided not to go forward with testing when she was younger for the same reason you give. She is now 11 and a few weeks ago, out if the blue, she asks about Asperger's and tells me she has always felt different to other kids (she was a bit teary about this). She asked if there was a test for Asperger's. When I told her there was, she asked if she could do it. So, we'll be off to Noosa it seems!
Maybe it would be a relief to your daughter to know that the way she is has a name? In our home asperger's is not a negative. Hubby is on the spectrum and she has only heard it talked of in a positive light. Tania would be able to give some tips on how to manage this xx All the best mama, will be thinking of you.
Research Aspergers in girls/women as much as you can. Once you feel ready to progress to the assessment stage, ask around for someone who specialises in women on the spectrum.
Anxiety is a big part of autism.
For your daughter, and your whole family, it's helpful to know what you're dealing with, to have understanding, and know how to help and support her better.
Unfortunately the system we live in functions with boxes, fitting people into them, ticking them and applying labels to go into boxes. In order to access funding (for support) at school, we need a diagnosis such as autism, not ADHD or anxiety, as they don't fit any funding boxes. Then there's the NDIS, all new and a bit confusing, but it's all about individual support for the 'person with a disability' so we need labels and specialists and therapists reports for that.... I see it as a game I have to play because of the world we live in. None of it defines who we really are.
It's a whole new world, with a whole new language, and it's confusing and heart breaking at times, but aside from all the hoops we jump through, the bottom line is, we do it to help our kids.
Regardless of the 'label' they are still the same beautiful talented funny unique loving child. Focus on their strengths. I have 3 on the spectrum. We call any quirky traits their superpowers. Tell her about all the brilliant inventors, creators, scientists, entrepreneurs, artists, activists, etc who have their superpowers too.
Celebrate differences
I'm going against the grain.
Our daughter (8 at the time) was the exact same as your daughter. Preferred adult convo, wanted to know every little detail etc. She even struggled with friendships.
The school suggested a psychologist. So we took her.
The psychologist said there is absolutely nothing wrong with her, she said she wants tp give our daughter an IQ test (she is a clever girl) so we did.
Her IQ was above where most kids her age should be, but 1% lower than being above average if that makes sense. Her psychologist said that kids with a high IQ tend to show signs of Autism etc because their brains work at a higher level than kids their age, which is why they like adults more.
I would get a whisk test before the autism. The school can organise it and it will cost you nothing. If you go to a psychologist it will cost between $600-$700.
Good luck X