Hey Imperfect mummas!
I'm so ashamed that I'm even typing these words but I need advice...or support... Or to feel less alone in my feelings...I don't know. I just had my third baby. It was a surprise pregnancy. I adore that child like nothing else on the planet. In many ways I feel like this child brought me back to life. This child is perfect and amazing and brings me so much joy.
But I just can't shake this awful feeling of regret...I stub it out as soon as that word enters my head. I don't even want to think it. Everything went a bit haywire after bub was born. My relationship. My feeling of security. My dreams. My goals. My family. Things with my relationship have since, somewhat, which is great but I feel like my other children are incredibly unsettled, the family feels disjointed. I don't get any sleep... At all. Im tired and cranky most of the time. Finances are tough. I feel like this baby broke things. Please let me be clear...I would never go back and change it. This baby is amazing. I just have this feeling of dread. Like I made a bad choice (even though I WAS protecting against pregnancy) and I've ruined all of our lives.... I can't shake it. I almost feel like I'm grieving.
Am I alone? Why am I feeling this way?
4 Replies
How old is Bub? Could this be PND? Please see your GP. It’s going to be okay. Even though it’s your third, it’s still a huge adjustment for everyone. Be gentle on yourself... you can get through this. Please make an appointment and see your Dr, it might help to chat to someone out side the box to put things into perspective
Hi I agree with the above answer see your gp & tell them exactly how you are feeling. Lack of sleep though can alter your mood in dramatic ways & not allow you to see clearly. Guilt doesn't solve anything either but get help for how your feelin incase it is post natal depression. Finances can be sorted you and your family will be ok 🙏💕
Go talk to a professional counselor
You are definitely not alone!
I also felt like this with #2, like I had ruined everything with this perfect little bubba. I was cranky and sad and happy and exhausted and everything else. I finally saw my GP when my husband cracked it and told me there was something wrong with me. I have PND, it is lonely and confusing, it takes time to heal and learn how to deal...but you are not alone, and you haven’t ruined anything. Your body will settle as will your kids and finances. Ride it out, ask for help, accept that help! And remember you are not alone!! We’re all right here with you x