Hi, I need advice about how to get help for my son. He's 7 with speech difficulties and other learning difficulties and some behavioral problems like refusing to do work at school and fighting with teachers over it. Usually it's when he forgets to wear his glasses and his eyes get tired. His teacher refuses to remind him and can't see that is why he ends up fighting with her because he can't focus on the page it makes him grumpy. He was refused help from ndis because he has no diagnosis and I can't afford all the appointments he needs by myself. We think he might have autism but not sure as he doesn't really seem like a child with autism if that makes sense. I know alot of people with autism and his father has autism but he's different from them and only has a few autistic signs. When he does do anything repetative he has grown out of it. He was sensitive to noise but has grown out of it, he used to panic in a crowd but has also grown out of it. tantrums when tired and has anxiety but I'm wondering if that could something else because any issues he has had doesn't stick. Like his father has had the same problems since he was a child and didn't change. I've been quoted 1300 for the autism test. I'm worried about the cost because even if I can come up with the funds what if he ends up not having autism where do I go from there. I'm just not really sure about the process of all this. He does not like apologizing for certain things though and he will lie about bad stuff that has happened him. Like a kid pulled his pants down and he said it never happened even though alot of people witnessed it. He won't dob in a bully even if he admits someone is hurting him. He has fine motor skill problems and coordination problems which have improved with glasses. Any clue anyone with what could be up and how I can get him help?
4 Replies
You need to start with a referral to a paediatrician from your gp to start with. Instead of focusing on if it is autism or not, focus on getting him checked and finding out what is going on with him. There are so many different things it could be like learning difficulties, anxiety from being bullied, sleep issues, his personality, odd, adhd inattentive, auditory processing disorder etc. He may not even require a diagnosis but just some extra assistance in certain areas and a specialised parenting plan. However, you must make the first step to get him help as he is obviously struggling and you may end up just needing a few sessions with an OT who could work with the classroom teacher. Good luckxxx.
Actually apd fits him so well. Thankyou :)
Speak to the principal about the teacher. She’s certainly not helping things by refusing to remind him. Or at least put a list on his desk. Your GP should be able to refer you to a public hospital waiting list for diagnosis but you will wait some time.
It sounds like you might live in a state where you need speech, psych and paediatrician diagnosis to get a diagnosis (some states only require a peadiatrician). If your husband has ASD and your son has "traits", then its highly likely your son actually does have ASD. The austism spectrum is so varying, especially when it comes with secondary diagnoses mixed in (such SPD, ADHD, ID, anxiety etc). Like the saying "if you've met 1 person with autism then you've met 1 person with autism" - this is so true. I have 2 children with ASD and they couldn't be more opposite, we were so shocked when we were suggested to get our daughter assessed at 3 yrs old (by the people we met who were assessing our son and seen our daughter). People have this stereotypical view in their head of what ASD "looks like" (I know I did before having my kids diagnosed).
The school and teacher are solely responsible for your son when he is in their care, their job is to educate and if his behaviour is affecting this then they have an obligation to work with you to resolve this. If that means trialing a way to remind your son to wear his glasses then that's what they should do. I'd suggest having a meeting with the principle and school and discuss these issues and also of your consideration of having him assessed, as they will likely be asked for input during the assessment process (if you live in a state that requires psych and speech).
Because we had to go through the diagnosis process 3 times within 8 months (moved to another state where the original diagnosis wasnt recognized), we found getting a referral for a mental health plan and using this for each psych session (3 visits) gave us a lot more back. Same with the speech (you re entitled to 5 allied health referrals per year). We found most psych's and speech were quite happy to do it this way too which was wonderful. We had the psych and speech assessments before evening going to the paediatrician. This also meant we got in to the paediatrician quicker (initial 12 month wait, but once we completed the speech anand psych we got in within 4 weeks) as we had 2/3 of the assessment completed so the paediatrician only needed to meet our children and read the reports and write his diagnostic letter (of course he had to agree with this).
The money is worth it regardless of the diagnostic outcome of ASD. The process and assessment itself should at least offer some suggestions if he doesnt meet the criteria for ASD. I strongly recommend asking around for recommendations before you book in to get your son assessed, this is 1 of the most important considerations to make. I feel for you, it can be upsetting, frustrating, and so disheartening trying to get people to recognize and act on supporting our kids appropriately. Speech and language on it's own are paramount to a successful outcome for any type of literacy or language based learning (which is most things and most subjects). You're doing great seeking advice for your son, remember to look after you too x