Has anyone else struggled badly after having your second child?
Our second is 5 months old and is actually such an easy baby 90% of the time.
But I still struggle, some days I regret having him and all I wish is to go back to just having our first who is 3.
It was so much easier, no demanding baby (not that he really is, but still have to work around feed times and all that)
was so much easier to go and do things, we could randomly decide to go somewhere without it being a hassle or having to worry about routines or a crying baby because their hungry
I’m struggling with it all and I definitely don’t feel as much connection as I did with my first but I do love him.
I just don’t know how to overcome these feelings, I just don’t have the patience or the energy anymore
Second child regret
Second child regret
Posted in:
Parenthood Guilt, Baby & Toddler
6 Replies
Sounds like PND please go and see ur gp and a psychologist u will get past this!
I felt the same to be honest
I found the transition between 1-2 really hard my son was 3.5 when I had my second. So much guilt about the life we had pre my 2nd.
But this 2nd little one will get easier too! I promise! Please don’t beat yourself up!
Going from 1 to 2 is definitely the hardest and I have 4. You may really benefit from speaking to your GP about your feelings.
My daughter was 4 when our second was born. After much fertility treatment. We had a lot of time to just be a family of 3. It was very smooth sailing. I absolutely feel going from 1 to 2 is hard. Our 1yo is delightful but sh@t man it’s a long day & its full on. I just think it’s an epic job full stop. You keep on keeping on, Mum x You will be ok when the demands are a bit less as baby is more independant.
I also really struggled with one to two children! Just remember you are in the thick of it with them being so young and it really does become easier. This is coming from a Mum who was diagnosed with severe pnd twice! There were days when I didn’t know how I would get through! Go and chat to your doctor about some counseling, it may help to get these thoughts out with no judgement. Take care Mumma xx
Any kind of child regret I put down to more likely being depression or things not working for you, being harder than they should be. Both can be linked.
Call in your supports to help ease your load, and talk to your midwife or health nurse.