Child harnesses

Anon Imperfect Mum

Child harnesses

I would just like to ask what people’s opinions are on child harnesses? My 3 year old is a runner! I have a 5 year old and a 7 month old also and when I’m with them by myself, he’s constantly running off! And he doesn’t stop or come back until you catch him. I bought a harness but haven’t been able to bring myself to use it yet for fear of being judged. But it’s a safety thing, especially at school drop off and pick up. Should I? Shouldn’t I? Help!!!

Posted in:  Parenthood Guilt, Behaviour, Kids

11 Replies

Anon Imperfect Mum

So many mums sit there and worry about what others think!

Stop worrying about others and their opinions of your parenting and parent your way! If your child runs off and gets hit by a car. Are you going to blame yourself and tell yourself you should have used the harness? Is you’re other half going to be devastated or ask what could have been done to prevent it (that’s if you have a OH) if you’re that worried about the harness you can buy wrist straps that look like a coil and stretch pretty far so the can run off a little and they’ll bounce back if they go to far.

My advice is stop worrying and basing your parenting on what others think and do it your way. I had a guy ask me if I had a dog or a kid. I told him I had a living breathing child that didn’t get run over by a car on our way there. I’ve had people bark at me and I just tell them to fuck off. They wouldn’t sell them if their wasn’t people out there that didn’t need them. I’ve used the wrist coil strap and the harness over the years for 2 children out of 3 kids and I won’t hesitate to use it for number 4 if I need to. His life comes before anyone else’s opinion. Be it my MIL or my own mother. I got the one used on me and my brother off of her when my second child was a runner and I couldn’t catch him it was a godsend when I had my third.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

I used one with my eldest as he was a runner, after he ran on to the road once that was it, his safety was more important than what other people thought of having him in a harness. I had 3 under 3 so I could not chase after him leaving my other 2 unattended. He learnt pretty quickly to stay with me, I just told him no very firmly every time he tried to take off. It looked pretty bad sometimes he would throw himself around being very dramatic 😂. Do what is right for you, don't worry about anyone else.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

I’m all for them! It’s a safety issue, who cares what people think but if it bothers you - people will see you have 3 children, one exceptionally young and need to do what is best for you!

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

People will see you have your hands full and completely understand why you use one.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

It’s simple, would I forgive myself if my child got hit by a car because I was too scared to use a harness??

I used one, no regrets because my son was safe and alive.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

Your other option is to get a double pram and strap bub and 3 yr old in it for every errand. I had to do that for a while. The harness sounds easier unless your 3 year old parks him bum on the ground and refuses to walk with it strapped on like mine did 😂

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

I have used one each on my 3 & 2 year old when we took them to the zoo and stuff in the city and I wasn’t risking them getting lost/hurt then.

Other wise I live in a quieter country town but i store them in the car and I’d use them if I ever felt it was better for their safety.

Stuff what others think of it means you’ve got a safe child.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

People will judge, it's what they do but they'll also judge you if your kid runs out into traffic.
You'll never win if you base your parenting choices on what other people think!

Use the harness, keep your boy safe.
Risking your sons safety to avoid judgment isn't the path you want to travel!

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

If it gives you peace of mind do it!!

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

I can imagine how scary that would be. I can tell you I was a harnessed kid because mum had two under 2, and I'm fine (I think!).

I certainly don't have any ill thoughts about parents using these as a tool to help keep their kids safe, while they learn the rules about holding hands and staying near grown ups near cars and roads.

Don't worry about what others think. Your child's safety is FAR more important.

like
Anon Imperfect Mum

Chances are there is someone out there already judging, but that is their problem, not yours.

I had 4 runners (thankfully they were about 2 yrs apart) and whenever anyone dared comment on the use of a harness within earshot of me I'd be quick to point out that they would also be the first to condemn me when my child ran off into traffic. Considering that I'm dammed if I do and dammed if I don't, at least I know my kids are safe, so the commenter could go and eat a cucumber!

Savage? Maybe. But motherhood has too much guilt without some judgemental prude buying in on the argument.

like