I feel horrible. My cousin (who I am very close to) has just started trying for a third child. We both have two children within a few months of each other and do a lot together. I'm pretty sure I want more children (especially now) but my husband is adamant we will not have more. She told me today they decided she would stop contraception and officially start trying, I found it hard to continue to even talk to her at our morning tea, I guess it is jealousy and confirms I want more children, but I can't. She's not even pregnant yet, I feel terrible as I should be excited with her but I just want to cry and yell at hubby :(
Someone close to you having more children when you want more but can't...
Someone close to you having more children when you want more but can't...
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Sisterhood Stories, Pregnancy, Baby & Toddler, Kids, FAQ
3 Replies
My hubby was pretty set after second child that he didn't want anymore but I was undecided, we waited for a few years and found I still really wanted more kids and he was willing to entertain the idea. We ended up having number 3 but even before I gave birth hubby had booked himself in for the snip. I would dearly have more if I could but I respect hubby's feelings and right now 3 is well and truly enough.
I would have loved more, but wont have any more because there is a huge chance any future children will have a severe disability. I financially could not afford to put my little family through the expense again. I found it really hard the first few years especially when someone else announced they were pregnant. I think its ok to feel jealous and its ok to acknowledge to your friend in a nice way that you are feeling that way and its ok to have a cry to hubby. You aren't a robot. Over a few years I became really happy with not having more kids. So even if you don't have that third Im pretty sure at some point it wont seem as bad as it does now. I suppose my point is there are a lot of people out there who don't get to have all the kids that they want and yes they grieve for that loss but at some point things get easier.
I feel the same. I am now in a fantastic relationship with a wonderful man. I have a 6yo son from my previous marriage. With my ex, there was no way I wanted anymore children, but now I am with my partner I really do. We have spoken about it, but financially we can't just yet but in the back of my mind, 40 is just around the corner for me. Friends around me and my cousin too are all having their second babies. When my best friend announced her second pregnancy, I almost cried. Yes, I am happy for her, but I'm sad, as I don't know if there would be anymore for me. That hurts.