So long story short we had our son assessed by a psychologist resulting in highly likely adhd and mild-moderate autism. She strongly suggested to see a pediatrician a formal diagnosis and possible mediation. We are following her advice with her being a professional but I’ve told a couple people in our lives and they’ve voiced that why would you mediate if he is not not naughty and grades are good, im painting a vague I know. I’m so scared I’m making all the wrong choices I’m struggling to parent and always second guessing myself we want what’s best for him and are trusting professionals to help us ot, Specch therapist and psychologist all are involve they all agree we’re on the right path I don’t know what I’m asking I’m so confused
6 Replies
Learnt to trust you and turn off the voices of others. You can try medication, and you know what it doesn’t have to be forever. If you see no change then work with your paediatrician and to take him off the medication (some can’t be stopped straight away).
My daughter has just gone though assessment for autism (again) her previous assessment years and years ago was Aspergers but that’s no longer accepted for NDIS funding. The assessment was called an ADOS assessment and is done by a OT (ours was anyway), they’ll give you the report and then the paediatrician gives the diagnosis based on that report.
While he’s not struggling now (without medication) that may change in the future. Honestly it sounds like you’re doing everything right now; keep trusting yourself to do right and ignore the people that don’t do the daily thing with your child cause they may not see all his struggles like you do.
Good luck
You do you and your family! Other people are not walking in your shoes. Home is your son’s safe place. He might be reasonably well behaved when at school or out in public, but when he gets home he’s able to relax and that’s obviously when you are seeing the behaviours that have led to you seeking a diagnosis. When other people express their opinion on the possibility of your son being medicated, tell them you are working with well trained professionals to make the best decisions for your son.
My DS has ASD. All I can say is - get used to it & have a strategy to deal with it. Do not take the comments on board!! Imagine them bouncing off you. Eventually, it works.
The support we've received from professionals, caring teachers etc. has been invaluable. The therapies are what help us struggle less because I can say to his psych 'this is happening' and get strategies to help. I'm so glad we ignored the negative, ignorant comments.
It's still exhausting to deal with. It doesn't stop even with diagnosis & when therapy strategies start to kick in. The comments never stop.
The most effective reply I have is to casually say:
'There's nothing wrong with him. He just thinks differently & we're helping him navigate this non ASD friendly world so he has the best possible life. That's our job.'
Shuts them down every time!
Go back and have the conversation with the psych..they are really great at explaining reasoning of the way it works and why and wheb you would do it, because at the end it's your decision, but they have an excellent knowledge. It's hard sometimes to take it all in and we realise what we didn't understand or think about when we talk with friends, so now you realise you dont get that part fully, go back to her and discuss it further.
ADHD comes with this stigma that it makes a child wild! There is soo much more to ADHD then what people see. I remember chatting with my neighbour, who's son plays with mine daily, and when I told her of the diagnosis I got the same response you did.
My son was only diagnosed 12 months ago and believe me I tried everything google could recommend to avoid medicating him. At the end of the day medication has worked best. Instead of phone calls from the school saying your son has hurt tommy im getting phone calls about how well my son is doing. Medication alone is not a fix, this is also mixed with regular psycologyst appointments to assist with emotional disregulation.
Get the early intervention now, the earlier the better. I have two kids with global developmental delay. I don’t bother telling my family about their speech and ot progress because I get met with- “they’re fine, there’s nothing wrong with them”. lol I’ve never said there was anything “wrong with them”, but that they need extra help.
Your family and friends aren’t on the front line seeing exactly what’s happening. Trust the professionals with the degrees 👍