Hi IM's
So little back story, I have a 9 year old from a previous relationship. My husband and I have been together 7 years, married for 3. We are 28 & 29. We both decided we wanted kids and would start trying as soon as we got married.
Fast forward 3 years later and nothing 🙁 i haven't conceived at all so no miscarriages either. My cycles are regular, no issues with period. we have been through our GP for testing, and so far everything has come back normal other than Hubbys sperm test. GP said his count was lower than what they want to see but some men's fertility vitamins would help?. Neither of us are overweight and we live a generally healthy lifestyle.
We want so badly to have our own kids, I feel like I'm starting to miss out because majority of our friends have started having kids in the last 2 years.
I obsessed over TTC for so long! I was tracking everything, testing all the time. Dreaming about being pregnant and having babies. It was really intense. And it really sent my mental health spiralling. After 2 and a half years I finally managed to "stress less" I stopped tracking everything, I don't test and for the most part I don't think about it anymore, or at least distract myself when I do start thinking about it.. We aren't "actively trying" but obviously doing the deed unprotected and if it happens it happens.
I've recently found myself starting to stress again, and this time I'm just more depressed about it than anything else. Its literally been my dream to have a family life. My 9 year old is with us in a week about arrangement. And I know I'm being selfish with my thoughts and feelings, I've been told I should be happy I have 1 because there are so many who struggle. But I'm just sad 🙁
I'm not really looking for advice I guess, just needed to vent. I feel like I can't talk to anyone because their reply is always the same. " you need to stop stressing it'll happen" "if it's meant to be, it'll be" etc etc. And then there are family and friends constantly asking if we are pregnant yet, why aren't we trying.
Anyway! If you got this far, thanks for reading. If anyone has any advice on what we could do next, may be see a fertility specialist? I'm just not sure. 😪
4 Replies
Definitely see a fertility specialist.
Routine testing can only show so much, I would be asking for a dye test into your tubes and see what is going on there. 3 years is not normal and the mental struggle you would be going through is so immense and unfair on you :(
I would suggest a meeting with an IVF clinic, they will get you into testing immediately. They usually wait 12 months to test for reasons not to fall pregnant, so 3 years will mean they will push you through faster.
Fingers crossed that you have the success you desire <3
I know some people are really sceptical but I do know some people have had success with natural therapies as well. Worth throwing it out there as a possibility.
I could have written this exact post other then having any previous children. TTC now since 2018. Hubby also low sperm count. I feel ya sister, it’s bloody tough!
I agree with seeing a Fertility Specialist. There are so many more tests they can do. And there are also options to try before doing IVF. Seeing a FS will also take a bit of the pressure and stress off you