Open to all advice.My husband and I agreed to have his teenage sister (different mums) living with us permanently last year but We have always been a part of her life and she has been staying with us off and on for some time we have always tried to be apart of her life in any way we could and love her very much she has grown up with our children and although we are not her parents try to treat her no different then our children. There is very minimal contact with her dad and Mum has been in and out for 5+ years. We are now looking at applying to Centrelink for child support as the mother receives child support from the dad and has not had her daughter in over 5years. She is now at the age where we want to help purchase a car and put away for her future. We are financially able to do this without it but I also don’t want to take away from the future I had planned for our kids. We feel selfish and struggle with the idea that in this instance We feel like We are treating her differently. The mum can fly off the handle and be very aggressive we are concerned doing this will really affect the little relationship she has left with her daughter and are conflicted if it is worth jeopardising that.
6 Replies
I wouldn’t bother if it has the impact for such negative repercussions. A car is not worth it. Can you encourage your husbands sister to work and save, and then match what she is able to save? If buying a car for your husbands teenage sister will take away from the future you have for your children, then either youre not as financially stable as you think, or the car you plan to purchase is too expensive.
It is also a great learning experience to help her to set a goal and work towards it, rather than just buy her a car or give her money.
I believe her claiming the child support and receiving it is illegal, seeing as she is not in her care.
It can have some pretty serious repercussions.. I myself would be chasing her up for child support 100%.
I would apply to Centrelink and let them know how long she has been living with you. You will need to provide proof and it might be a headache getting all the paperwork completed but so worth it, you will be backdated ftb so it should turn out to be a nice sum. Then that will have a flow on affect to CSA. CSA works differently so you probably won't be backdated by more than 3 months but at least she will stop receiving and you will be eligible for cs from both the mother and the father. Hopefully she gets a bill for ripping everyone off for the last 5 years including you guys and her daughter.
Do not be intimidated by the mother. It sounds like she doesn't really care for her daughter anyway, if she's going to act like an ape because she needs to start supporting her own child instead of ripping her off then she doesnt deserve to be in her life.
You need to inform and apply to Centrelink for her fam tax and you need to inform child support that shes in your care not her mothers care and talk to her dad about her being in your care not the mothers so he can raise it with child-support. You could end up receiving child support from both of her parents for her care. Which could be used for the things you have suggested.
I wouldn’t bother. You probably wouldn’t get much anyway. It would be worth the $10 a week. Maybe get her to do some jobs or support her in finding a job. I’d leave the mum right out of it.
the “mother” has been committing fraud for 5 years, she could be jailed for it! If you can prove she has lived with you for those 5 years then definitely go into Centrelink. You 100% should be receiving support for your sister in law.