Hey all! So, I have been offered my dream job. Great hours, 5 days a week, a great step in my career.
But. The commute. It will be approx 50 minutes each way (90% highway). All good for me. But I have a 2yo who would have to come with me. There are no care options where I live, and relocating is not a possibility at this time. Does any one else do this sort of driving with a young child?
Kiddo is great in the car. I would hate to pass up this job, as I have worked so hard and waited so long, but do worry about that much time in the car each day. The guilt I have associated with even thinking about accepting this job is immense, as it will take me away from my baby, but it’s an opportunity that doesn’t come up often in my industry. Thanks for any advice!
24 Replies
I used to travel 2.5 hours 2 times a week as a kid (to spend the weekend with my dad).
My step sister had a 1.5 hour bus ride to school each way starting at age 4.
50 minutes in the morning and 50 in the arvo is a small price to pay for a great job in my opinion. It might take a slight change in routine for the little one but I'm sure it will be fine.
Organise yourself so that there is always water, snacks, activities etc for the car. Even like only car snacks and activities so it's a bit special. Even (worst case scenario) for the drive home, you get like a DVD player for the back of the seat. Go to Kmart and buy a few bits and pieces.
You've got this girl. Don't pass this up!!
I live in a rural town and its totally normal for kids to travel for this long on a bus to and from school each day. Don't feel guilty! It sounds like a great opportunity. Go for it!
100% take the job, kids adapt and before you know it, it will become the norm. Congratulations!
It’s 50 mins. I drive 3 hours each way to work. You really gonna pass up a job just because of a short 50 min drive? I sit longer than that In traffic.
Omg 6 hours a day?? How much of your pay goes to fuel?
My petrol is covered by my job.
I would say this is a really common commute for many parents. Many do it with their kids too because if the daycare is near their workplace rather than home they can get there quickly if needed and don't need to worry about traffic stopping them from getting to the daycare on time for pickup etc. Your kid will be fine with that travel.
Its too much in my opinion. I did it with a 2 and 6 year old and it was unsustainable. Way too busy, early mornings, late nights, and it just goes on. If it werent full time, maybe, but it is.
Also there will be days its much much longer. And days you have off work but still need to drive that for your kid, they won't feel like a break at all.
Why would you take your child to daycare if you have the day off? You don't need it if you're not at work.
Of course silly me. Having a headache or gastro and watching a 2 year old is blissful. Having to justify why you might need a few hours child free (that you are paying for) thats always enjoyable too, thanks.
Fair enough. Didn't think of that because if I was too sick work I would keep the kids home because usually we were all sick together (and I didn't want to drive). Days off for other reasons were bonus family days I looked forward to working full-time. Wasn't being snarky... Just didn't see when you would have the day off but still want daycare booked.
You have daycare booked and paid for and the child has a maximum number of days they have off before you lose you CcS. Snarky or not, insane you cant imagine others lives are different to you. I dont believe you have real experience doing it.
Honestly, the main reason it was odd to me is if I'm sick enough to stay home I'm not driving. My kids had health issues requiring surgeries etc when they were daycare age so I was always over the number of days they could be away no matter what so I didn't really care about that. Also, that was back when you only got a certain amount back each financial year so for 6 months each year I paid full price without subsidy whether they were there or not. So there was no motivation to send them on days off (which, let's face it, if you're not sick or on carer's leave is really not often if you're working full-time).
Wow so you send your kid to daycare when you have gastro? You do realise how contagious that is and how selfish you are?
I send mine to child care on a day off because I pay for the child care and if I am getting a day off, I'm entitled to enjoy said day off to myself.
How judgemental. Wow.
There are other circumstances than your kid having gastro! Youre the dickheads that couldnt imagine one and chose that one, holy shitballs the stupidity
The horror, putting a child in care when you’re a full time working, single mum in a stressful job with serious mental health problems, a child with physical disabilities and you just need a day to yourself. A day off work is a family day 😂😂😂 sorry to burst your bubble, but sometimes, some of us are battling demons you don’t understand and that day stops us from drowning. We can’t drown, because we are the sole provider of food, shelter and everything in our kids lives, but sometimes, we just need a break. Sometimes all the little things add up and the weight gets too heavy.
Happy for you that you don’t understand......
I absolutely love and have always loved the time in the car with my kids. We talk, play games (like eye spy, maths and word games etc), I swear it's the only time I have their full attention 😂 but I also love driving. I say go for it! All the best for your new adventures mumma ❤️
Agreed. The women I work with and I (when my kids were that young) would pack dinner for the car ride home too. Pre cut steak strips and veggie frittata or other healthy finger food that was car friendly too so when we got home, the evenings were easy and there was time for baths to include play time etc and not be rushed and still have kiddos in bed at a good time.
Just give it a try, get your foot in the door. You can see how it works for you. Let go of the guilt and go for it.
I actually think it will give you time to talk to you child in the commute, sing together, eye spy. I also think some times a bit of blind faith that things happen for a reason. I would take the job stick it out for 12 months and if the travel is a killer or you decide it's not you jam, then make a call.
Congratulations! dream jobs are few and far between, you have got this
I have done it for years with both kids since they were babies.
They would sleep on the way home - which I hated but worked around as they got a bit older. I use it as bonding time and practice for counting, or games such as eye spy (but with colours not letters/words), singing songs, games with how many cars are blue or red or white. Just make sure you have water and snacks and a change of clothes (one of mine gets a bit car sick sometimes) and your good to go.
I travel 4 hours + a day 5 days a week just to take my kids to school with a 2 yr old most days. He is use to it now. He has a travel bag with toys etc. It's tuff but it works.