i am 42 solo parent with two children 9,8 my new partner would like a child i am open to this but my first two were difficult pregnancys gestational diabetes, placenta previa and planned c section at 37 weeks with my first. Second bled continuously born at 32 weeks by emergency c section has a heart condition not hereditary.
What do you guys think?
3rd child at 42?
Tuesday, 22 June 2021 - 07:05
3rd child at 42?
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Pregnancy
8 Replies
I wouldn't do it, not only the risks but you sound like you're only doing it to keep him happy. Just make sure it's really what you want.
I'm not sure exactly if you're asking what we think about a baby or the medical problems, so genuinely sorry if I overstep.
If it's what YOU want then talk to a doctor about the medical concerns.
If you are seeking opinions on what we'd do in your situation, because you are only considering this for a new partner, then it's a harder than concrete NO. Mainly because I'm biased in having seen this scenario play out more than once & every time it ends up being the mother doing the work, sacrificing, then ending up struggling & solo, again, while the man who desperately wanted the baby buggers off. It may not happen, but you've got to ask yourself if you'd be ok with it.
I would personally say no, I definitely wouldn’t have another at 42. But Goodluck with whatever decision you make .xx.
My kids will all be adults by the time I'm 42, so for me I'd throw myself into an active volcano before having another baby at that age 😂
But then I know some people who are just starting or are still adding to their families at age 42, so I guess the age factor is purely personal preference.
The health factor is something that needs to be the biggest consideration here though. 42 is classed as a geriatric pregnancy and is therefore high risk by default, add on your history of high risk/complicated pregnancies and you've got a scenario that really needs to be weighed up carefully. I really think you'd need to discuss this at length with an obgyn before even entertaining the idea!
If you class yourself as a solo mum, then hell no to having a baby because some guy wants one or chances are very high youll be a single mum of 3 in your 40s. Definitely consider how that sits with you as part of your decision.
I’m a single mum, same age.
Unless I had been with this man for ten years, no way in hell.
You know who gets left holding the baby.
I probably wouldn't do this, cause if you die who has your kids best interests?
However if you are keen, seek professional advice with your previous files under your arm. walking across the road isn't with out risk. so make an educated decision. Good luck
For me, I don't know if I could have a new born after 8 years. Your kids are hopefully sleeping though and can generally do most things for themselves. It is a big adjustment for everyone going back to newborn stage.
My mother had a 5 year gap between baby number 4 and number 5. Then she had another so number 5 wasn't lonely.
If you are wanting to have a baby for you as well as your partner then speak to your doctor about your risks and concerns. You may also need to be okay with being a single mother to 3