TW death.
My 6year olds teacher for last year and this year recently passed away from a very short cancel battle aswell as her unborn baby. She was the most beautiful person and all he's known for schooling. Up until this point we told him she was away having her baby. We had no intention of telling him of her passing but other parents in the school have told their older children, it's a rather large school, so we know he will find out. We'd rather prepare him now and open up to questions. But we don't know how to approach it with him? He's already extremely anxious over death and losing us so it's a very sensitive topic.
Our 9year old also had her for a short time so we will have to tell him as well. Thank you 🌈
Explaining death to children
Explaining death to children
Posted in:
Loss & Grief, Helping others through Grief
5 Replies
How sad for that poor teacher. You could tell him that she is with her baby now in heaven. Just say it gently and don’t make too much of a fuss about it. How awful. Once you tell him give him big cuddles and tell him if he feels sad at anytime to come to you for hugs and any questions. he won’t quite understand it all.
I would tell him shes been off sick and you were hoping she would get better but she didnt and sadly, she has died. This means she wont be back at school and you wont get to see her again. Let them lead the way, they most likely know what death is.
I told mine that I wanted to tell the truth because I know youll be upset but I also know some other kids at school know and you might hear it and I dont want you to be confused.
Also, you dont want to be the person that tells other kids that way, so we can talk about it at home but not at school.
And finally I found a friends kids who also knew the teacher so mine had kids they could talk together. We also planted flowers in a garden all the kids together and they wrote a lovely This is for Mrs x' note and planted it too. We showed them how we can do things like that to remember special people.
I posted this one tonight, in case you need advice urgently. I’m so sorry to hear your family are going through this 😔 xKelly
There is no easy way to tell a child someone they care for has passed away.
I had to tell my children when my dad died, I decided to just tell them straight what had happened but in an easy to understand way, I sat them down and told them that poppy's heart had been very sick and the doctors couldn't make it better and he had died. From there I just sat and listened and answered any questions as they come. I also helped them make something they could put up, they chose a picture of poppy and they created a frame for it to go on the wall, it seemed to help them a little as we were unable to attend the funeral
We all die, it’s the life cycle so it’s important to be honest and upfront. I think the more you are exposed to the idea as a child the easier it is to come to terms with the inevitability of it all as an adult. Also children are fascinated by everything. They will probably be more interested in the idea of it than feeling the grief.
My son lost his Yia-Yia at 5yrs. He saw her in palliative care, he also chose to see the open casket in the church and watch her go into the ground. He and his cousins were fascinated.
He then lost his Grandad at 7yrs. He saw him in palliative care and chose to see him at the viewing before the funeral.
This year we lost our beautiful little dog. We put her down at home. He sat and watched while it happened and then held her. It’s was beautiful.
Lost of discussions have been had over the last four years about what happens etc. and we talk about how everyone has a different belief. Daddy and Nanna believe in God and heaven, I believe in an energy, Buddhists believe in re-incarnation.
He’s decided he loves the idea that we come back and live again in a different form.
Yes there were some tears but kids are so resilient. Just hold them and let them know they can talk to you about anything. Don’t be afraid of exposing and teaching them the most important life lesson of all.