Hi sisters,
My partner and I have been together 11 years this year and we have one son together and I have one son from previous relationship (no contact with bio father since before he was born) my partner has raised our son since he was 1 years old and to him, it is his son and to our son, he is his dad.
I want to know though, what legal rights does my partner have to my son? I looked at legal guardianship and adoption but it looks like a long, difficult and expensive road to travel down (we are in SA). We aren't married yet but engaged to be, what rights would my partner have to our son once we're married?
My biggest worry (although I know a crazy one) is that if something happened to me, what rights would my partner have to our son? It would literally kill him if he was separated from him or had absolutely no say in what was best for our son. My parents have already said they would expect my partner to keep both our children with him but under the eyes of the law, is this okay? (If something were to happen also before we were married).
It's just something that's been circulating in my head lately haha. Thank you!
My partners rights to step-son.
My partners rights to step-son.
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Men's Business, Being a Dad, FAQ
5 Replies
Yes, that’s totally ok! It’s a good idea to get a will drawn up properly though to state your wishes.
It’s no different to if you asked your child to be raised by your best friend in the event of your death, except in your case this is better because you will be maintaining the family dynamic!
I don't know that marriage automatically comes with any legal rights to non biological children. Should something awful occur say tomorrow (God forbid of course), I imagine your son would be able to remain with his brother and step dad based on the fact he's been around long term and is the only father figure.
I wouldn't leave it to chance though, I'd get some proper legal advice now to see what can/should be done regarding the legalities surrounding guardianship in the event of your death. It sounds a bit morbid but I commend you for thinking about it and wanting some plans in place should that occur.
He would be considered a guardian and under the circumstances I doubt he would be removed, given his age and he knows no other parent. Just put it in your will. I know it's not the be all and end all by putting it in your will but it is taken into account if there's an argument after you die. My cousin is terminally ill and has stated in her will who she wants to care for her kids and also discussed it with all of her family so that everyone will respect her wishes.
I was adopted by my stepfather as a kid, he needed my bio Father’s consent to do it but it was the only way he’d have any legal rights when it came to me. Even if you put it in your will, the bio parent can overturn that as their parental rights trump your wishes.
It honestly wasn’t that long of a process - we are also in SA.
My partner had to navigate this exact situation after him and his former partner separated. Due to a range of reasons his non bio child was placed by CPS in his care and due to the period of time he had parented this child he was recognised as her legal parent/guardian despite never having gone through any formal process to become so. Mum is actually supposed to pay him child support, though she doesn’t. I feel as though due to the period of time and the bio Dad being absent he would be ok, but maybe think about putting something in place if it concerns you x