How does everyone get their kids to bed without dramas??
My 8 year old is going through a stage and has on and off for year where he cracks it at bedtime. We've literally tried everything and to be honest it's getting really draining he can get really angry at us then it's a 15 minute ordeal of water toilet hugs and whatever else that distracts him from going to bed . Any help would be greatly appreciated
10 Replies
Melatonin gummies. Only thing that helped us with my son. Anxiety prevents him wanting to go to bed because he thinks too much at bed time. It’s draining.
I tried gummies for my son and sleep wise they worked but I found his behaviour was bad while on them, different to being tired
Whenever he has melatonin he is sleepy the next day. He has been diagnosed with ADHD recently which I am getting a second opinion on, not that I disagree with her diagnosis, he's not really hyper just lacks focus. He's been taking ritalin, which apparently has helped heaps at school. Buy nothing at home really as it's worn off by then. But I do think he gets anxiety
Wow I hadn’t noticed this with my son but he does say he gets a headache sometimes, so Dr said to halve it. Dr also said give it to him around 7pm
What's he reacting to? Is it feeling rushed? Needing connection with his parents? Worried or stressed about something?
My money would be on seeking connection based on the delay tactics being used. Can you sit with him once he's in bed or for 20-30 mins before bed, just to talk or read together? One on one? My 11 year old often has some thoughts or worries come up at bedtime that they like to chat about. I spend 20 mins with them chatting about their day before they go to sleep.
He's usually watchg tv or playing Lego. I am home with my kids all day and am wrecked by this time so I'm usually in bed. He often hates doing things that he's asked to do eg shower,, get dressed and bedtime. I do get what you mean though.
If he's ADHD this might be demand avoidant behaviour or something. Try reframing questions as choices and giving timeframes. E.g.
"In 5 minutes we're getting ready for bed. Finish your show/pack up your toys".
Then once the time is up "Do you want to shower first or brush your teeth first? These pajamas or those ones?" Helps it not seem like a demand but a choice.
Also in response to your other comment ADHD doesn't have to be hyper. There are 3 types - inattentive, hyperactive or combined. Also the comedown from Ritalin can be brutal. Make sure he feels supported. He sounds anxious too if I'm honest.
I'm ADHD and so is my kid.
Adhd would be your answer here. He has trouble shutting down, his minds is racing and so he is doing things - anything - to be up and about instead of having to stop. Stopping is very uncomfortable when you’re full of energy inside. Being alone with your thoughts is very hard when you’re anxious.
Try music, a checklist to shut down and wind down, a later bedtime possibly if he’s not overtired, (no screens), and look for adhd bedtime resources.
Yeh we have noticed his behaviour since starting ritalin being really bad in the afternoons, but his pediatrician apparently only works with ritalin. We have an appointment soon. But surely there's something that can help comedowns and help the evenings it's so hard for us. If he's not annoying his brother he's starting arguments with us. Our pediatrician has told us nothing, we are very unhappy with her services, not explained a thing on how the meds work what to expect.... I don't even really think the ritalin hits the nail on the head properly as I feel he becomes really intense but his teachers say hes concentration is much better ... This is so hard. I have a referral to another pediatrician