I suffer terrible anxiety and stress. My stress is getting to me a lot lately and getting worse recently with the cost of living and bills piling in everywhere etc. and without even really realising it, I was taking it out on the kids. I’ve just been so snappy, grouchy, easily annoyed, and bossy. So in turn, now it’s wearing off on the kids and their behaviour is getting worse. They’re grouchy and snappy at me all the time. It’s become such an uptight household. How do I get out of this? How do I keep my cool? How do I get rid of my stress and create a calm, happier household?
How do I destress and create a calm household?
How do I destress and create a calm household?
Posted in:
Mental Health, Self Care, Parenthood Guilt, Behaviour, Kids
3 Replies
I was like this, I was so bad and agitated all the time. My poor kids copped it. I felt terrible and would always apologise to them once I calmed down. I went to my Dr and got on a low dose antidepressant. It’s helped immensely. I also now don’t stress the small stuff, if my kids are pushing my and I can feel myself getting angry, I walk away into another room or find another Space to be in until it blows over. I could feel how unhealthy it was for me and my kids.
It takes effort. But you can put the effort into engaging with the kids and it actually turns their behaviour around which can turn yours around. For example, instead of sitting on your phone escaping them, then hearing them bickering then snapping. Put your phone down, go and ask them to get ready to go for a swim (help them pack their things etc) take them out, and you’ll find the whole tone has changed. Then you can go home, again if they moan and bicker doing something without you - for eg both kids will cry and slam doors and end up dead if I make them have a shower while I cook dinner. So instead, say ‘I’ll help you with that, for now help me set the table, get the drinks ready, then do the small things to help them get in the shower and it all goes well.
Stress is a hard one but you have to remember how badly it impacts on them. If they drop a glass of water and you lose your mind because “you can’t afford any more glasses right now and you’re sick of never having nice things and children doing this is why your things are always messy and wrecked” your kids take that on themselves, along with the frayed nerves of the stress of it all. Keep in mind other children (whose actions are exactly the same as your own) are given grace and told “it’s ok, mistakes happen, we can fix this”. It helps to keep in mind that my children deserve the same grace. I want them to grow up with those things in their mind when they make a small mistake.
Love this 🙌 I needed to read this too! Thank you 💕