hey mums i need help my once so kind caring son has just become so disrespectful towards me more then any one really hes just so mean and nasty if i say no to him he will call me a b!@ch and thats the nice one i got a call from the school to say hes been swearing at kids at school and then today found out hes not been taking his medication for ADHD witch would explain the behaviour change but i have always said if you dnt wanna take it tell me and we can seek different options i have 3 other kids and hubby is fifo so it just me home with them am i doing something wrong am i not hearing him like what can i do to fix this it breaks my heart seeing him so angry at what im not sure he wnt talk to me tells me to shut and f#@k off if i ask him to get ready for school he will say shut up dont rush me any advice or help would be great
1 Replies
Structure and routine is important for these kids. Pretty hard when you are on your own and hubby is fifo. Pay attention to whether his behaviour worsens on transitioning tasks or at certain times of the day. It may be about just saying okay in 30, 20 and then 10 minutes we are doing this. Or it may be he is holding it all in at school and releasing it all in his safe space at home.
Best thing to do is to reach out to a Psychologist if possible. Even school based. They will be able to help you to track behaviour and implement strategies to help.
I know it's hard but try not to see it as you are doing something wrong. He just needs extra help with learning how to regulate his emotions. They usually.lash out at the one they feel will still love and forgive them 💕
If he will not speak to school Psychologist then maybe seek one for yourself to work on how to manage his behaviour and outbursts. Also getting him into some sport or karate where it's controlled movement is helpful.
Remember to praise, even if it's the smallest thing and still say I love you even when he is making it hard. Make sure dad is setting a good example when he is home and spending time with him.
You've got this, even if it feels like gravel rash off the end of a slippery slope lol. As a sole parent (mine is FIFO too) you sometimes become used to doing things on your own but you can definitely seek help for this one 💗