My husband passed away 4 years ago and our eldest daughter (now 8) came to me the other day crying because she can no longer remember him, it broke my heart like you cannot possibly understand.
There are no videos, no voice recordings etc.
We talk about him often and I always bring up stories about him to keep his memory alive. We have photos of him around and I do my best to keep his memory fresh but it has gotten to the point for our daughter that she doesn't actually remember these memories anymore. She just knows the stories if that makes sense.
I desperately want to help her but I have no idea how.
We also have another daughter who is 4, I was pregnant with her when he passed so I desperately want her to feel a connection to him too.
I'm really needing any help I can get.
Thank you.
4 Replies
Wow I admire you as a woman and mother on what you are dealing with, no advice but my heart breaks for you x
Go round friends family anyone & let them know, you never know what you might dig up xx
First of all, many hugs to you. My dad died when I was almost 1.
What your doing already is great by keeping up with the stories and having photos around.
Keep talking about him, especially the things you see in your daughters that remind you of him, it will make them feel closer to him even without the memories. My mum had heaps of photo albums and I always had access to them so it was something I used to look through often and I now cherish those memories of being alone with him in the albums and talking to him in his photo.
I will admit that it was probably not until I became a teenager that I really struggled with not having a dad and I did rebel a little so be ready if this happens but also be kind as in my case, I didn't realise I was actually grieving at the time. I truly grieved when I became a mother myself. Looking at my girls at the age of 1 broke my heart for my dad, myself and especially my mum when I really realised all she went through with two small children so I truly admire you and send you much strength and peace.
Your doing all you can do and a great job of it. Take care and all the best. With a mum like you, sounds like your girls will be fine xxx
Oh that makes me teary. You should write a book of memories for the kids, write stories about outings you had and the way he felt about being a dad and have it bound together with photos. I'm sure there would be an online company who did something like that.