I posted here a few weeks ago about my partner and I going back to work full time and what we can ask and expect his kids to do around the house. I got some really helpful answers and it seems they have adjusted better than we have!
I'm working an hour and a half from home in a very brain exhausting job. I leave at 7 and I'm lucky to be home by 7 each night by the time you factor in travel and my partner is working as a delivery driver in a truck for pittance pay.
By the time I get home he has normally done what I've asked for tea and the kids have done the dishes and veggies after school too so it's just a matter of putting it all together, coordinating it all. As stupid as it sounds this is more exhausting than my job. I don't have the energy or patience to have two kids and a partner asking me what is that, what do I do with this, what is that, what is that, do I have to help I've already done blah or when I've asked for some help with something having to ask 3 or 4 times before I'm heard over the other questions and someone gets off their phone or iPod to help.
I'm exhausted and I don't know what I can do. I spent my weekend preparing the lunches and dinners as much as possible so it's all stream lined.
I've got to the stage I'm eating tea in a different room to not have to deal with them. They are really trying I'm not going to pretend like they're not but my sex life is a mess, on the rare occasion we have the energy the kids are in the next room, I'm emotionally empty and mentally screwed.
I really need some tips and pointers on how dual working parent families balance having a life!
Sorry for being so long xx
3 Replies
Oh I feel for you. Both hubby and myself work we really struggled with the food side of things for dinner so one day I cooked a heap of different meals put them in single serve containers and froze them. Now if we are too tied to make dinner or finish late each person pulls out a meal into the micro wave and theirs dinner, quick, easy, and most importantly painless. Not everyone likes each dish so I did a few different choices.
I think you need to give it a bit more time for a start. This is actually a huge adjustment for you and it has only been a few weeks. It is also a huge adjustment for them and the questions, that is them adjusting. Over time they will learn what belongs where and what goes with what. I would also suggest teaching them how to follow a recipe so there are a few nights a week where you just walk in the door and eat. It is ok to say I need some time to unwind and quiet time, go have a shower as soon as you come home and let hubby and the kids handle it! Maybe try and listen to some relaxation music on the way home so you are a bit more relaxed when you walk in.
I agree with above... I am a solo single mumma working full time but have a 3 year old so she's now learning to do a few things now but yes it has all been up to me to everything... I KNOW HOW HARD IT is :-( just give it time - you will adjust and if you catch a train relaxation music can seriously help! Never been into it before but i like you was willing to try anything LOL! Just on that there is an app called Omvana if you have an iPhone! Glad you family are all pitching in :-) I can't offer anything on the love life front as above mentioned I am flying solo... :-) Good luck mumma!