This doesn't happen to people I know, it's always on the news or in the movies.
My friends teenaged son was caught in a rip at the beach and drowned. She is broken. It has been a few weeks since the funeral. I just sent a message letting her know I was thinking of her. She opened up a little bit, and it just breaks my heart knowing how hurt she is. I'm lost for words. I can't even reply, I don't want to say the wrong thing.
What do I say to someone whose child has passed away?
What do I say to someone whose child has passed away?
Posted in:
Loss & Grief, Helping others through Grief
5 Replies
Say that, say you don't know what to say, but are hear to listen and if there is anything you need help with, she is to let you know.
Tell her this!
Tell her you can't possibly understand the pain she is feeling but you are here for her anytime she needs.
Tell her you are heartbroken for hee.
And if you knew her son then tell her how devestated you are about the his death
What you say now will count but it's more so what you say in the next few months.
Everyone supports just after death but she will need ongoing support and to know her son is not forgotten.
This is where you can stand up and be a true friend.
Also do random things, take her a meal every few weeks, give her a hug.
Especially on or near his birthday, this is when she needs the most support
I think saying the wrong thing is better than saying nothing. Just don't avoid her, and you can straight up tell her you don't know what to say. Where words fail, food doesn't. If she's local, make her a meal she can freeze and reheat. I think a casserole can say something words can't.
Just ring & talk to her ask her how she is feeling, if she wants to open up let her. It's always nice to have someone to talk to. My godson was 19 & he sadly took his own life 3 months ago, I try & ring or text my Aunty every week & just ask how she is feeling. It's nice that they have someone thinking of them & they enjoy talking about him, please don't feel awkward asking her how she is, she will appreciate that you are thinking of them
Just dont stop talking about him unless she asks you to. He isnt here anymore but his memories are still extremely fresh to her and while people still talk and remember him he lives on. Tell her you know shes probably heard all the sorry's she ever wants to hear but that you are there for her no matter what she needs. as others say immediately after a death everyone says they are there then they all drop away, dont be that person. Annoy her love her and hold her when she falls and she will love you for it. Thank you for being such a caring friend.