I post here often about trying to leave my abusive relationship but never end up leaving.
Im now going to be completely honest because tomorrow i am going to the police and leaving.
Im on the single parenting payment. He made me do it for more money.
I know, i feel so disgusting for it.
He is so controling. I had no option.
We have been on and off the entire time.
Tonight he hit me again becausei told him i was leaving when we are financially stable. I told him i wouldnt fuck him over.
When i ran off crying with our daughter he hid my phone. I only just got it back.
He told me if i ever leave him he would use everything against me. The fraud, dirty pictures and a very embarrassing disease.
He also told me he would make sure i would be a vegetable and he would punch me in the nose if i screamed like that again in out house.
Please help! Im tryingto act "normal" so i can leave tomorrow.
All my stuff is already packed from trying to leave last time!!!
15 Replies
To be honest, the centrelink thing is a small thing. You will be able to sort it all out, its red tape but you need to get away from him first and be safe. Your safety is the priority. Try not to believe everything youre thinking thats stressing you and making it hard to make a move, push through it, there is a normal, safe, legit, peaceful life waiting for you and your child .
Dont tell him youre leaving again. Id suggest deleting this and taking your kids and only bare necessities in a backpack and going to a womens shelter first chance you get.
Alternativey, cal the police and wait quietly until they arrive then you can leave in safety while theyre present.
Honey everything he is trying to hold against you is nothing.
Stay safe tonight
He saw me typing alot and just looked over and said he would stab me before anyone gets here. He is acting normally now so i was just planning on sleeping on the couch like i do every night.
He goes to work very early and Im already meeting up with my dad tomorrow morning. I feel like this is a good idea because i can delete as many nudes as i can find and pack all my daughters personal stuff.
He wont do anything with your nudes. Hes a coward and an asshole. Once youre gone he wont do anything, hes trying to control you and scare you into not going, but staying and trying to delete nudes is what actually is dangerous. those are big threats to your safety while youre inthe same house as him. Can you text your dad to come over tonight? Make up a reason he has to stay?
Unfortunately i know he will.
He done the same to his ex when she left. She accused him of rape and that was his pay back.
I always took his side but now i dont know who i believe. Everything she has accused him of has happened to me.
Its scary but these threats are feelings - scared, embarrassed, humiliated, try to see that you will overcome anything in time it will pass. But physical injury and staying in this cycle of fear and abuse is much much more of a real danger to you.
Please update us how you are today.
Its all my daughter's stuff i really want.
Im still planning on going to the police station tomorrow and getting a restraining order.
Babe, its just stuff! Material posdesions can be replaced! Your life and your daughter's life cannot be replaced. You're in immediate danger and I think you should call the police and get their help to leave in saftey now. You can have the police escort you back to grab your stuff at a later time xx
I would be sleeping with your child to make sure he doesnt hurt them. Once he leaves pack your stuff get someone to pick you up go straight to the cops tell them everything get a restraining order against him make sure you include your child aswell.
I wouldn't bother with "deleting" files. Are they on the computer? If so, as long as you know which drive they're on, just format the drive before you walk out the door. It'll wipe everything.
Does it really matter about the nude photos?
They're just photos. It's just you naked and natural. Its no big deal in the scheme of things, and definitely not worth risking your safety over.
The 'stuff' doesn't matter, either.
Where are you located?
There are plenty of places that can help you get back on your feet so you and your daughter have everything you need.
I'd also suggest recording his threats if you get a chance, so you have solid evidence when it goes to court.
I hope you got out safe.
Are you ok? Did you leave?
Yes i left.
I got a vro against him that morning and reported it yesterday.
I feel like i can finally breath.
Thank you everyone for all your help.
Thank god! I hope you and your daughter are doing better now, the first few weeks are the hardest... Stick to your guns, don't remember the "good" times, remember how much easier it has been outside that horror... Good luck mum, on to bigger and better things xxx