So lost! I'm 21 weeks pregnant and Drs have discovered a mass on baby's brain. They don't have answers as to what we can expect after birth or a clear cut diagnosis. We don't know what to do from here! I can't imagine a life of potential cerebral palsy for my child but the thought of termination makes me ill too.
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Start watching the Paralympics. Yes a life with disability can be harder than a so called normal persons life BUT life with a disability can be extremely fulfilling, happy etc. There are athletes with all kinds of abilities at the Paralympics, some who are using there mouths to roll a ball to play Boccia. I don't think those participants are unhappy or are sad. They are very proud of there achievements.
I have a son with multiple disabilities etc and yes I was terrified of what that meant, but he is the happiest young man I know. I wish I knew now, what I knew then! Because my fears were based on some huge misconceptions.
Firstly, I am so sorry. I think you need to arm yourself with as much information as you can about what you can expect and where to go from here. The doctors should be able to refer you to a specialist so that you can find out more. It is so hard for you to understand where you and your baby stand without knowing as much information as possible. Once you know more about what yo expect you can start looking into outcomes for your baby. For me a termination would depend on prognosis and expected pain and suffering levels for the child. It is such a personal and difficult decision that has no right or wrong. I think professional councelling would be extremely beneficial.
At 21 weeks and by the sound of your post you'd never forgive yourself for a termination. It will all be fine trust in yourself that you can give this child a good life for as long as they get. At least then you know you did all you could for your little miracle
Personally I would abort. Yes there are many success and heart warming stories. But could you ever forgive yourself if they were born so disabled they had no quality of life? You would have to provide round the clock care for them into adult hood or put them in a facility where they could receive that if you couldn't provide it? I couldn't take the risk.
Of course only you can decide this and i hope whatever you choose you find peace with.
I had a similar situation. At 19 weeks they gave me the option of a medical termination as baby seemed to have signs of disability. The way I made my choice was simply to lay out all the information I had in the end I decided that I had wanted my baby for many years and that whatever came with that was something I would tackle to the best of my ability, I know have a 7 year old boy and I don't regret my decision at all! I don't believe I would have ever been able to live with myself if I had terminated everyone will have different opinions only you know what is right for you. Good luck xx