Falling pregnant with Anxiety

Trying to fall pregnant and anxiety - I have sever" anxiety attacks" which has come on suddenly and harshly. All hubby and I want to do is have a baby ! We had put it off when I was first being diagnosed as I wasn't in a healthy state to look after myself let alone a brand new baby , after seeing endless Drs , psychologist , psychiatrists and so on .I was put on paroxotine (20mg) they were amazing , though on this medication there are risks with birth defects etc so we stopped trying until I could "get better " or "manage". So after 8 months of medication councilling and drs visits "we" as in drs hubby and myself decided to wean off them so we could do what we want to do so badly ...conceive ! It's been about 3 weeks off the medication and I've had an attack already almost to the point of passing out (normal for me sadly) I don't feel as happy or as easy going anymore and am quite agitated . I really don't want to go back on medication even though there are certain ones that are safe to use during pregnancy I still don't want to risk it at all ! All we want is to add to our family though and in a way not being able to just try and conceive adds to the anxiety , I'm just after other people's "OWN PERSONAL " experience in this . Weather you had fallen pregnant on this kind of medication or were put on it during pregnancy .