2 year old birthday problems

Anonymous

2 year old birthday problems

My daughter is turning 2 soon. And I'm not sure how to go about it. I live in vic and so does my dad and his wife (been married a few weeks but only known each other 8 months) my partners family lives here too. Any way the rest of my family (mum and her side) all live in nsw. Im going to have a little family party for her. But i dont know how to go about it. Mum and the family dont get along with my dad after a messy divorce and his new wife doesnt want anything to do with them or his kids really. Long story but shes a bitch to put it bluntly. Bit for my dad i choose to get along with her.
Long story short if dad is at my daughters party my sister and brotherwont be and possibly not my mum. They said they will travel down if dad isnt coming. Im in an awful spot cause i want every one there for my daughter. I hate family dynamics and just want every one to get along because theres not just going to be birthdays but weddings etc too!
Has any one else been in a situation like this. Could i maybe host it at a park instead of my house that way every one can get away from every one?
Any suggestions would be amazing!

Posted in:  Mental Health, Self Care, Sisterhood Stories, Parenthood Guilt, Behaviour, Baby & Toddler, Kids

5 Replies

Anonymous

Don't do it. Do two birthdays or just invite 'half'. This is not the event to force your family to get along. I've seen some kids parties go very wrong.

like
Anonymous

I agree with above poster, it's too soon - too raw.
Your don't won't miss out because she won't remember. Try maybe 2 parties or a smaller dinner with dad and the party with mum.
Goodluck!

like
Anonymous

Nope, you do your thing then if theyre all coming do a celebration with them. Its hard when your babys young but as you grow up you realise all this isnt your problem. People not coming is not the end of the world, you wont always have everyone there at one massive event, and it sounds like thats for thr best. don't turn yourself inside out to make something unnatural happen. Have a party, have a celebration with whoever isnt there for it. Who's who really isnt an issue.

like
Anonymous

Your daughters birthday is only about her. If your rellies can't behave like adults for a few hours for the sake of a child then whoever I thought would instigate any conflict wouldn't be invited quite frankly! If that's your dad then so be it.

like
Anonymous

I had this happen to me but it was just my mum and dad who didn't get along- no worries with the rest of the family and the new wife wasn't coming anyway. I told them to suck it up because it was a day for my child and everything else could be put aside. My mum was the one who lost her shit, refused to be at the same venue with dad and even ended up withholding babysitting so I couldn't work in the lead up because she felt I was abandoning her! Anyway, I ended up splitting the times- told dad he could come from 11-12:30 and mum could come after that until the end (dad was flying back home to Perth mid arvo anyway, so it worked out okay). Problem was that dad agreed to help me set up (I was doing the whole thing by myself and totally overcommitted for the 1st birthday extravaganza!) and he went awol until midday! I had no help setting up, dad was supposed to be getting ice for eskies and picking up salads from my work. He arrived after most of the guests and then had a bitch because he had to leave at 12:30. Honestly, if I did it all again, I wouldn't invite my dad. He's never stood up for me or my child with his new wife (2nd one, who's a manipulative dragon) and we no longer speak. It caused ongoing drama with my mum and he didn't even appreciate me changing the plans so he could be included. If he's the spanner in the works, leave him out of it and do something separately!

like