Somebody give me some words of wisdom! My brain is melting out of my ears from the constant whinging coming from my three year old. He whinges and cries nearly all day every day! From the moment he wakes up until he goes to sleep. I try and find the reason for his whinging, which results in him upping the ante!
I've tried finding things to entertain him, I take him outside, find activities to do inside but he just prefers following me around whinging. He won't tell me whats wrong even though he is a great talker and can communicate very well (when he wants to). Even when we are driving he will sit there just making sooky noises and if i tell him to stop it he makes them louder and cries like hes offended!
Its driving me nuts to be perfectly honest. Hes the most miserable unhappy child and I don't know what to do.
Whinging & crying three year old
Whinging & crying three year old
Posted in:
Life Lessons, Parenthood Guilt, Health & Wellbeing, Behaviour, Baby & Toddler, Kids
17 Replies
Teeth? They could be just making him grumpy and miserable without him knowing why.
No 😔 this has been going on months. His mollars came through and he was ratty then too but this is just non stop.
Developmental stage? I know it does make it easier to deal with but all 4 of mine have gone through that stage at about the same age. It’s annoying but it’s passes
It's a stage. He'll probably have a breakthrough and stop the same time as he develops heaps, in his drawing, speech, memory, letters and numbers, singing songs, coordination, getting himself dressed and his own drinks, then he'll be happier again.
Just sit down & let him be with you he obviously only wants you not all the activities if he’s following you around. Cuddle & talk, play & just remember it’s only a faze he will grow out of, sometimes the terrible twos don’t up the anti until 3yrs old.
I would love to just cuddle him if he didn't fling himself aroubd whinging about being cuddled when he wanted a cuddle. 😣😂
But thank you for your advise. 💗
Maybe every time he comes near you whinging, you cuddle him because he doesn’t like it and he will associate the whinging with a negative. At the very least he may go away and whinge to get away from the cuddle and you lol Oh the complex minds of a three year old!
My just turned 3 daughter is similar. Not quite as bad but, I'm glad to say is turning the corner. I found talking in a low voice telling her I can't help if I don't know the problem, and then putting her in a time out space if she persisted crying is helping. It takes a while for them to get the message so you need to keep it up, but I found out the hard way that attention, distraction, pandering to her desires was making it worse.
Now I say ' do you want to go to time out?' and she says no, and then I say tell me the problem then, but 'I'm not tolerating the crying'.
That’s fantastic advise - teaching children it’s not ok to cry when they are upset and don’t know how to express how they feel. 🤦♀️
I agree with the first comment of time out. If they arent going to tell you whats wrong and just want to whinge and cry then time out is needed until they are willing to talk. Either that or its bed time.
I have 5 kids and I disagree that it’s a stage. Did you consider maybe he’s in pain or his diet is a contributing factor? My 16 was a crabby shit for weeks until I reined him in from the crap foods, late nights and too much screen time.
Well I've wondered myself if its one of these factors but hes in bed by 7:30 (7 if im lucky) and sleeps until 8 or later. He eats a pretty balanced diet but is picky at tea time..and he doesn't spend a lot of time watching tv and doesnt have an ipad. I thought it might be the marvel movies his older brothers watch, freaking him out so I banned them while hes within the vicinity of the tv.
I don’t remember this happening with my three year old and he was an only child, I guess some whinge more than others, it’s their personality. But I agree with the other commenter, maybe there’s more to it, like foods not agreeing with him or he isn’t getting quality sleep. It would drive me batty too. Does he have any intense interests like trains or something, set them up on the floor to give you a breather? What about putting the telly on for a bit, does that give you some peace? If there’s nothing behind it, I guess you just have to try things and see what piques his interest. When they are older and they annoy you, you can start giving them jobs/chores or cuddle and kiss them and that makes them run lol
It also sounds like a bit of a habit, hopefully he will move onto something new soon 😂
Three year olds are arseholes. I don’t know why people warn about terrible twos, when I feel like three is harder. Has been with both mine.
My three year old does this too, she’s worse when we are busy, when her routine is changed or there is just a lot going on or attention isn’t completely all on her. It does pass though so I just try and keep my shit together for as much of it as I can. I know it will pass
I have 4 kids but am currently going through this with my youngest. He is not like it when it's just me and him but when his dad and one of his sisters (2nd youngest) particularly is home the whinging drives me crazy! Nothing was working and when you finally get out of his the issue, most of the time is easily solved (like yesterday's whinge and carry on was that his sister broke his bike, turns out he couldn't pedal backwards, cause obviously the back pedal break was making him stop)! Now I drop what I am doing get down to his level and put my hand up to say stop (but don't say it, cause that word along with no is a trigger for a meltdown) and I ask him "Is this a problem we can sort without the whinging?" And Its working lol. Something so simple, I tried all those things that worked with the other kids. Distracting, giving more to do, spending more time etc and none of that worked. My boys have struggled with this more then my girls.
I think in my case it's because my boys haven't been as equipped to handle emotions like the girls have been. They don't know how to deal so they either cry or lash out. I find it also helps discussing emotions with them and having a strict routine, doing the same things at the same time every day. Lastly some down time during the day, like resting. 3 year olds are over that day sleep stage but still in need of it. My son has and hour and a half of tv or iPad or just laying and listening to music or I'll read to him for 15 minutes then he can look at books himself. Helps us both to recharge and gives me the strength to face the afternoon lol.
Thank you. This is very helpful!
Taking him to the drs and get a regret for a peadeatrican he may have something wrong. No hem in getting him checked. Ears, eyes, nose, throat anything.! Rule it out first. He may be having pains in stomach you just don’t know.