Christmas Present - separate parents

Anon Imperfect Mum

Christmas Present - separate parents

My ex partner has bought an iPad for our 5 year old and has said that ‘she is allowed to take it anywhere she wants’

However I don’t want the iPad at my house. Myself, my daughter (5) and son (3) all share one iPad when they have screen time available. For me it’s the concern on how she will transport it to and from his place, school and my house as exchanges are generally done with afternoon pick up. I also have strong views on you kids having an iPad or gadgets for free use whenever they want. How would you approach this subject or please bring me back down to earth if I’m being pedantic

Posted in:  Parenthood Guilt, Kids

7 Replies

Anon Imperfect Mum

If he wants to send it to your house and it gets lost or stolen at school, then that’s his issue. I’d still limit the amount of iPad time to something you are comfortable with. Just because she can take it to your house doesn’t mean she gets free access to it.
I wouldn’t put my foot down on it. Let him work it out for himself.

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Anon Imperfect Mum

I’d be exactly the same. I don’t allow ownership of a device in my home for me 6 and 3. So I can control how long they have and they understand it’s a privilege not a right! Go mumma!

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Anon Imperfect Mum

Just because he sends her to your house with it doesn’t mean you have to let her use it. If it gets lost or stolen at school on swap over days that his problem. But while she is in his care you can’t limit how much screen time she has unfortunately. I fricken hate the things and refuse to buy my children one (I’m the worlds meanest mum apparently)

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Anon Imperfect Mum

Um no. He cannot make rules for your house and I’d be reminding him of that now before they are a lot older. My ex also used to try this shit on and it would then cause upset at my house. I made a very simple rule. You don’t take anything, you don’t bring anything home (with the only exception being the clothes on your back and school work).

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Anon Imperfect Mum

Don't even argue it with him, if it gets sent to your place put it up until next time she goes. It's at his risk if he wants it at school.

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Anon Imperfect Mum

Buy her a trumpet and tell him she is allowed to take it anywhere she wants.

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Anon Imperfect Mum

You can't control what gift he chooses to buy, unless it's something wildly inappropriate I suggest picking your battles.

You also can't control whether or not he sends her to school/back to your place with it. You can however tell him that you'll take no responsibility for the ipad, should something happen to it in transit or at school, that's on him and you'll not contribute to replacing or repairing it should that ever be necessary.

You are also still in control of the rules you choose to enforce in your home. You can allow her to have as much or as little access to her ipad as you are comfortable with when she's at your house. Dad has absolutely no say in that whatsoever!

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