Is it wrong to use the money you put aside for your kids if you were stuck financially? Obviously we would put it back when we could.
I feel sick just thinking about using it.
Using kids banked money
Using kids banked money
Posted in:
Parenthood Guilt, Kids, Money
10 Replies
Putting money aside for your kids is a lovely nice thing to do, it’s a luxury many families can’t afford, but your kids aren’t entitled to that money. It’s not wrong to use that money to feed your kids, house your kids etc. Until you gift that money to your children it is technically yours.
The only time your kids are entitled to that money is when it came from an outside source (birthday money, payout from a lawsuit/injury etc, they earned that money through a job).
You’ve got to do what you got to do to survive and your kids need food, clothing, health care, housing and transport. Savings are a luxury.
I always think it’s a good idea to keep money ‘put aside’ or saved for the children a secret. They shouldn’t rely on it existing and it’s not there’s until you’ve gifted it to them.
I used $90 from my daughter's bank account a couple years ago when we were struggling to pay a big electricity bill. I don't regret it.
Keeping your bills paid & a roof over your children's head is important and not wrong at all.
Just remember to put it back when you can.
Is it your money or money from grandparents etc? Are they young or teenager's aware of their bank balance and saving for a car? Is repaying it likely? I think my opinion differs depending on the circumstances. If they're older and it's from grandparents or a part time job I think you should ask them. Otherwise, don't stress
We’ve never had to however our intentions are that eventually, we will probably use some of our kids when they’re older. Especially around Xmas time if they want a flashy technology present that is out of budget.
I’m all for it if you need to do it!!! As long as you replace any gifted money
You plan to use your children’s own money to pay for their Christmas gifts?
We contribute thousands into their accounts each year, so yes - if my child would like a new phone for $1500 then yes, I will dip into their "own" money (that they aren't even aware exists). I have a limit for Christmas time but as years go on then obviously that will have to increase and alongside that, their contributions will drop and the money will go into my Christmas funds account.
Really? I guess we are all different. If my kids want expensive stuff like this they’ll have to have a job and work for it to buy it themselves. I wouldn’t use their money for expensive gifts for them. I’d only use it for necessities. Kids don’t know how to do without these days. My kids will always only get what we can afford as it’s the thought that counts. Not sure why you would obviously have to increase it but each to their own.
A child's immediate needs are number one on the priority scale - there's no point having their future sorted if their present is up shit creek.
So if you're about to lose your house, your car, have your utilities shut off or be unable to put food on the table - then you should feel no guilt about using it.
I had no choice to get the house we live in , I cried for months, but it was mum who made me realise its ok because the house is for them. By getting the house we provide the kids with a stable roof over their heads and when we can we will do new accounts. Times have been very tough and never thought I would be in the situations we have for 2 years but I feel the light is near.
I was like that when we used our kids money for our house deposit. Then I thought well it’s for them anyway and if we need it we need it. You can put it back when the time is right but it is hard once you do use it to put it all back. But got to do what you got to do. We never had that privilege growing up.