Hi mummies. My 17 year old son has just lost a good friend suddenly in an accident.
Its only fresh and he's not taking it well.
I know nothing I can say or do will magically take the pain away, but I am at a loss.
I lost a friend to cancer in high school and some of the well meaning comments from my mother broke our relationship beyond repair. I don't want to make the same mistake here.
Any help or suggestions would be greatly appreciated or any warning signs that its going to turn worse than just sadness and grief. I just want to help my boy
Teenagers and death
Teenagers and death
Posted in:
Loss & Grief, Teenagers
6 Replies
You don't have to say anything at all to support him. Just hold space for his emotions, let him lead you. Listen to him, hug him, let him talk. If he's afraid, sad, angry, confused etc that's all normal. It's okay for him to be any and all of those things.
Perhaps contact Headspace or Beyond Blue if you need additional support for him. It is a shock and a terrible to lose a friend so young especially if that's your first experience of death. I wish you and your son all the best.
Counselling 100%.
My dad died last year in an extremely traumatic way. Although I am an adult my brother and sister were 15 and 11.
Its been 14 months on Christmas and my sister is still having weekly counselling. Its a time thing unfortunately. Hugs to you and your son.
Take him to get come councilling, start with a drs referral. It helps heaps and it’s important the speaks with a professional.
My boyfriend drowned when I was 17. I was with him at the time and couldn't save him.
Look after your son and be there for him. Tell him he can talk to you. Speak with fond memories of his friend and reach out to his hurting parents.
This is an early life lesson that nothing but time can help the pain and grief.
I was fine, I grew a lot in that time after it happened and I learnt a lot about myself and how resilient I could be.
I wasn't offered counselling only valium. which I didn't take.
Counselling..even just the offer of it would have been good.
My son is 20, he has so far lost 3 close friends, 2 by accidents and one suicide, he took it so hard the poor kid, I got counseling for him and we just talk to him and make sure he’s doing ok, we are a very close family and he lets us know when he’s doing it tough, lots of hugs and love and just being there for him has helped a lot xx
Just be there for him there isn’t anything you can say,
I unfortunately lost 8 people between 13-19 3 in the same fortnight my dad was just always there is we wanted to yell and scream he listened if we wanted to cry he listened if we wanted to talk he listened if we didn’t want to do anything he gave us a hug and kind smile