My partner and I were looking online recently at sex toys, need to upgrade the old rabbit, when Ive stumbled across the now massive range of toys available for men. My partner asked if he could get one for himself. My immediate reaction was ‘omg no’.
Obviously Ive been thinking about it, if the women can have them, then so can the men. I’m still a little weirded out by this for some reason. I know he watches porn.
Does your partner have his own sex toys? I am feeling so old fashioned right now
A bit of a back story - been together 17yrs. Sex toys aren’t an every day thing for us they really only get pulled out on the odd occasion
18 Replies
Fleshlight and butt plug.
I just find it weird he needed to ask and then find it weird you said no. If the shoe was on the other foot...
"Obviously Ive been thinking about it, if the women can have them, then so can the men."
From the original post.
We have a healthy sex life but When my husband asked for a fleshlight i went right out and bought him one! Haha. I find it completely normal.
I'm with you. I'd find that weird and so would my hubby. There is no right or wrong. I don't have a problem with it, but my initial reaction would be that it was weird.
Why is it weird?
That would just be my initial reaction that's all. No strong reason, it just would be.
Hubby has a few fleshlights, pumps and other little entrapment. Rings and what not.
My husband has a fleshlight (from before we were together) and we a few butt stuff for him. Both aren't used much at all, but if he wants to use them he can - I don't have an issue with it.
He has tried some rings, but didn't like them, we also tried a pump but didn't really see much of a difference so we only used it the once.
I think you just need to open your mind to it and let whatever happens happen. It'll be fun regardless and both of you will have a good time.
Lol yeah no I’m with you. Depends what he’s asking for I suppose. If my husband asked for a but plug I would be weirded out. Each to their own though.
Why though?
Because anal, besides not being for everyone, is an additional topic to sex toys.
I have a male friend who has one secretly and is ashamed for his wife to know as she is a prude. I hate this. Men deserve satisfaction too. Sex is meant to be fun and sensual for everyone. Sex toys are not just for women. I say embrace it. And spice up your sex life.... I’d rather my partner be curious with a toy than another vagina. Just saying 🤷🏻♀️
(I'm not OP) My husband was so stressed that I wouldn't accept him when he told me he wanted to try different things.
I felt quite upset that he didn't feel comfortable coming to me.
I really feel for the men that can't go to their wives regarding their sexual curiosities. Being married, you should be able to discuss anything.
It’s definitely a very women dominated field, but we certainly have a few things hubby gets to enjoy too. But I do know what he has and at least one of them (fleshlight type of thing) I actually bought for him
It is definitely something to explore together and you might be surprised how new doors might open for you😊
First of all, he likely felt really awkward bringing this to your attention ( him wanting a toy) and for you to be so close minded could have potentially damaged his self esteme and perhaps made him withdrawal with communication on the topic. First thing would be to apologize.
Second of all, good on you for self reflecting and realizing your initial reaction was wrong and wanting to help him find what works best for him.
My husband and I use a wide range of toys, from her toys, his toys and couple toys for both solo play and together play!
We use alot of prostate massager, my husband originally was hesitant for this toy because most straight men naturally do not want their no no square being played with, now, we play with the prostate massager more than any other toy in our arsenal! He loves it. Pocket pussys are also fun for men for when you don't want to play with him but he wants to get himself off they are fantastic solo toys. Also look and explore your kink toys to play with together to see if anything you otherwise would think "no" too becomes your new favorite, you'd be suprised how exciting sex can get when you explore away from the normal.
My partner and I have a huge range of toys. He would have as many as me and it is so much fun trying them all out together. I have found it brings us closer because if we can be open about our fettishes we can be open about anything. I love to hear about what he's using when he is alone too. It really has made our sex lives even better.
My husband uses my different vibrators 🤷🏻♀️ what's mine is yours baby 🤣 if he told me what he wanted I'd be all about supplying that!