Hello, okay so I have four kids. My two older kids have just recently decided they want to stay with their dad & come to me every second weekend.
My youngest are 2 & 4.
I just got a job after being home with my youngest for two years. It’s an amazing opportunity and a traineeship in the government. It’s 18 months full time.
I separated from my husband January last year.
I recently started seeing someone younger than me by nine years. He is an amazing person. But it moved really quickly, & I got cold feet and ended it on good terms. I also wanted to concentrate on my new job and myself & enjoy my independence. This took me a long time to love. When my husband left I was broken and terrified of being alone. Now I love it.
so we broke up and four days later I found out I’m pregnant..
He wants this baby. He wants it wether we do it together or apart but he is fighting for us to be together.
I’m not against termination. But I do know emotionally and mentally it would be really hard for me..
five kids is a lot. I’m scared of judgment from other people. I’m scared I will lose my new job because of this pregnancy and I’ve waited so long for my turn at a career… I’m so conflicted.. do I go ahead with this pregnancy & work it out as it goes knowing it will be hard & risk my career… or do I terminate & put myself first…
I can’t stop thinking about how everyone will just think I’m nothing because this will be my fifth child to a third dad… any advice would be appreciated because I am so lost right now.
Thanks in advance.
3 Replies
If this guy has a good job to support you then have this baby. There will be plenty more opportunities in the future. Take it don’t tell them your pregnant yet and go from there.
Stuff what others think..!
Sounds like an amazing career opportunity.
Sounds like you have a future plan on what you want your future to look life and are excited about it.
Sounds like this guy isn’t right for you, or you wouldn’t have broken up.
It’s not selfish to keep going as planned, to not have the baby, your plans are to make an amazing life for your others kids.
Don’t feel guilty.
You don’t have be tied to this guy for life.
Do what is right for you.
Good luck mumma bear, you’ve got this.
PS If you decide to have bubs, I strongly disagree with the person who recommended you take the job. It’s not an ordinary job, it is an 18 month traineeship, that you know you will be unable to complete. Give someone else that opportunity, maybe you can discuss/negotiate doing the next traineeship in 18 months time.