Affair at 15 (Thank you)

Im in tears !! I felt compelled to say thank you to everyone who sent messages of support on my last post. I am overwhelmed and was not expecting such an understanding and nurturing response.

This whole experience dictated who I was as a mother, daughter, wife and person. I can’t believe it took me 12 painful years to finally realise this was statutory rape. I didn’t even know it had a name. He was a very well loved guy, a doting father and husband so he had everyone fooled.

He knew everything about my abuse when I was 5 and he was my dads best friend so he helped me through our rocky relationship. I worked for him which is where we spent a lot of time alone. This event was very well known in my area and he told lies to protect his reputation. I can assure you his wife was not told the full truth. I do remember him telling her I was 18 at the time and it was once. Everyone blamed me entirely and my own dad called me a sl*t and still talks to him occasionally. He added me on fb under a fake account trying to apologise and ask for me back shortly after the birth of my 2nd child 4 years ago.

They lost an older child, I could never wish that on anyone ever. Therefore, I will never report or intervene with their lives and I wish them nothing but happiness. I simply just want to move on and be free from the way my mind has tortured my whole being for 12 years and created so many insecurities that affect my daily life.

I read every single message and I really feel like this was not my fault now. My husband read them too and he was so happy for me to hear this from others. I did get lucky as he is so loving, protective and patient - I feel safe and loved. I will work on getting the help I need to finally forgive myself and be kind to my inner child.

Thank you all so much xx