How do single mum’s afford to live?
A very rough idea of my circumstances. I am a mum of 3 (9,7,3). I have no help to babysit my kids if I go back to work so I’m considering opening a family day care, I’ve run one from home before. I can’t see any other viable way to afford day care and work.
Rent is $500/wk where I live. I’m out of town so my fuel is $150/wk. Groceries $250/wk. And that doesn’t even cover bills, insurances etc.
I am being emotional, coercively and financially abused and I want out. My eldest child is already suffering badly mentally and so am I.
My breaking point is that hubby pegged a spoon towards my son (3), just missing his face and it hit the door across the room with enough force to rebound off the door.
My question is, how would I afford to live? I have no idea about centrelink payments, how much I’d get, rent assist etc. I want to know that I’ll be able to afford to live if I make the move to leave.
I earn $400/wk at the moment at my day job and that covers my fuel, 3days of daycare with $100 left over that goes to any bills due etc.
Thanks x
11 Replies
You’ll need to have a look at the Centrelink website. There used to be an online calculator.
Payments that you might be entitled to, parenting payment single, family tax benefits , rent assistance.
Your child care payments may change.
I am not single mum but we are a single wage family and I was just thinking the same thing. It’s so hard 😩 by the time we pay, rent and bills, petrol we only have enough for the food basics. It’s crazy! i feel for everyone in this position. It seems so much harder now.
Can you go and stay with family for the now until you sort something out and work out what you can afford once you get centrelink. Don’t stay any longer, get out. Also if he throws anything at your kids, call the police. The pig! You would get around $1400 a fortnight or maybe more id say. Not quite sure but you need to get the ball rolling and get out asap. You’d also get rent assistance and concession card
You can't run a business from a rental it is a headache for the owner as far as insurance, tax, rates, council approval go. Go onto the online estimator and find out what you would get without child support. That is the amount you will need to budget on as child support can be unreliable especially if he's abusive he will find ways to not pay it. Some even just quit work so they don't have to. Working out of town would only pay off if you were working full time, $400 a week won't be worth it. Good news is you won't pay much in childcare. If there are cheaper rentals where you are try and move into one, I know it's not a good time but start trying. You will survive, it is hard but you can do it and it will be 100x better than living with what you're living with now.
Was just watching the news about rental affordability here in Qld (not sure where you are) and they said there were no rentals in Brisbane that a single parent could afford hence why women in dv situations aren’t leaving. Could you ask him to leave and you stay in the house? Use the Centrelink calculator which will give you a rough idea what you could get.
I’m a teacher and working with kids and going home to kids non stop is draining - the idea of doing it as a sole adult always in your home sounds like torture to me. The support network and adult chats is the perk that keeps us sane.
I would suggest instead to Consider that your kids will all be in school within 2 years, using before and after school care, you’ll be able to work a full time (or part time) job - out of the house and with other humans.
I don’t know how you teachers cope. You all do an amazing job. I couldn’t do it. Mentally it’s hard enough now without being a teacher.
You’ll get plenty with Centrelink plus your job, probably about 2000 a fortnight plus child support from him. I wouldn’t go changing your job. Just sort out moving out, find somewhere you can afford to live and get accepted - you’ll probably need to sign up for Centrelink single parent to show the income to prove you can cover the rental. I would get that ball rolling, I think once you see what you’ll get you’ll feel more confident that you can do it.
Please talk to your local DV service, like DV connect. They can help you make a plan and will be able to answer a lot of your questions, they may be able to help with housing and can also help you get fee relief from childcare to heavily reduce your childcare costs while you are transitioning to your new life. Centrelink can also help, including with emergency payments to help you leave. Even some banks now offer emergency funds for DV victims to get out.
It is hard but so worth it, I remember feeling trapped and like I couldn’t afford to live with out him, turns out the opposite was true. I was much better off as a single parent of 3 and working part time than I was in an abusive relationship with someone who drained me both financially and emotionally.
You can do this.
You put kids in daycare & work full time. Was that my life plan, no. But been doing it 5 years now (kids both finally in school). We have a happy, normal life now.
I am not in your situation but if my Husband even dared to throw an object at one of our kids (4 & 2), I would have pack our bags and left then and there.
OMG your poor baby. What if the spoon would have hit his eye or head, he may not even be alive for you to be writing this.
I am sorry but just get out and worry about how to survive once you are all safe. You will get Parenting Payment Single l, Family tax A & B, rent assist and Child support. Also go for half of his superannuation.
Join the Centerlink support for Australian mums page on Facebook. There are very knowledgeable and very helpful.
Reach out to some DV support services in your area, they will help you get free of this disgusting excuse of a human
I worked 4 days a week when i was a single mum (i only had 1 child though) and then with child support which was about 150 a month and centrelink, i did alright. I must admit though this was about 12 years ago, so rent wasn't as high as it currently is.
Centrelink help with rental assistance, also give a huge help with child care, electricity bills and you don't have to pay rego on your car either.
All combined i lived quite comfortable being able to work with the cheap child care and the assistance i got. Hopefully if you were able to get help with child care, you might be able to work and earn more, Possibly move closer to work so that you aren't spending as much on petrol.