Hi mummies, anyone have any advice? My ten year old just will not go to bed at night!! I've tried everything. I limit screen time, limit dessert to before a certain time, have a good bed time routine, give her a chance to talk about her day...but no matter what I do she will just not settle and go to sleep. I will put her to bed between 7.30-8pm and she is allowed roughly 30 minutes of reading time with a lamp on then its lights out but after that she will either get up constantly with excuse after excuse or just sit on her bed and play. This can go on until after 11pm sometimes! I've taken her to a gp and a paediatrician, both said that she will 'grow out of it' with no other helpful solutions. The ONLY thing that seems to work is giving her melatonin gummy! They work but I don't want to give them to her forever...what else do I do????
5 Replies
It’s anxiety. This is my son!! I’ve learnt to let him go to sleep when he falls asleep. . It’s way too stressful. He now has melatonin to help him wind down. In saying this, I do take him to a psychologist to help him with his anxiety. He is getting better at bed time but it’s been very exhausting on me over the years. I let him sleep in my room but that will stop soon as the psychologist is helping with that too. Nothing has ever happened to him, it’s just him. He has my anxiety genes. She needs a child psychologist. Ask Dr for a referral. She has anxiety. She won’t grow out of it. She will learn to manage it. Get a referal and care plan from your GP. I ask for a female one. Google some in your area.
By the way, my son is 14!
Just give her the gummies.
I have always been a night owl, even as a kid - I'd often go weeks at a time on 4-6hrs sleep, and then just sleep for 48hrs straight.
My mum basically just accepted this and I could read in bed as late as I needed to.
As an adult, I do the same - except I found a nightshift job, and it suits me perfectly. I still take half a restavit every morning to get to sleep.
Some people are just wired that way 🤷♀️
Psychologist could get you to complete a sleep diary to look for triggers.
However, I would start with:
*Dimmer light in bedroom
*Meditation for kids which you can listen to with her to help her to settle.
*Move things earlier so she is playing with her toys and not coming into her room at bedtime and wanting to play.
*establish a reward system until she learns to self-settle e.g. toys packed away and going to sleep by 8.30. In the morning she gets a star and works towards a weekly goal.
*possibly some glow in the dark stars or something to look at so it's not completely dark.
* maybe a calming diffuser she has on at bedtime
*calming story time, read that book ;)
You don’t have to do the melatonin forever, just until you have retrained her body clock, and honestly isn’t it better she has the amount of sleep she needs? We did Melatonin for a few months and it was enough to bring our daughters sleep time back from 11pm to a reasonable time. She still doesn’t sleep as much as some kids but it’s enough for her and at least we get to bed at a decent hour too!