How do you stop an ex husband from sending abusive text messages ? It’s been 8 years and attempts to coparent are fruitless due to his continued anger and vitriol. I have no idea why he is still so angry. I was the one who left him due to DV which was witnessed by our 3 children. Even a simple text like ‘what time are you dropping the kids off ‘ is met by an angry response about my mental health or me not doing enough in terms of pick ups and drop offs. It’s been 8 years. He chose to move an hour away. Our court orders state that pick up and drop off is at the local school. I just don’t know how to manage the vitriol anymore without it affecting my kids. I’ve done everything not to involve them in this but it’s wearing thin. Xx
Tired of the ex husband vitriol
Sunday, 28 May 2023 - 16:34
Tired of the ex husband vitriol
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Mental Health, Anxiety & Depression
5 Replies
It’s been nearly 16 years and he still sends abusive messages whenever he feels like it. For the most part, I ignore him now. I don’t communicate with him unless I have to. I thought he had finally started to grow up because there’s been nothing for over a year, until recently . The latest has been that I’m being abusive for wanting our son to be as healthy as possible before major surgery. I ended up getting one of the specialists involved so that a minor procedure can go ahead, so that the major surgery can happen a couple weeks later.
Try speaking to DV connect or another DV service, to see if they can give you some advice on what you can do.
Was that order before or after he moved? He could go and get it amended so you need to do 50/50 of the travelling. My BIL has to pay for every second flight from overseas even though his ex moved away.
Sometimes people have to move, for work, affordable housing etc.
If you travelled 1/2 hour each, he might not be so angry.
Two hour trip both ways is a lot.
Sometimes we need to compromise when people's circumstances change, even though legally we don't have to.
I can see why he's angry, not sure why you can't.
Oh and you aren't anon, so if someone you know sees this and tells him, that most likely won't further your coparenting efforts, but add fuel to the fire.
If you're after peace.....
How old are your kids? once my daughter was old enough and had her own phone, i told my ex to stop contacting me and to call my daughter if he wanted to make plans etc. He barely made contact then. Now they have nothing to do with eachother either. But cutting him out of my life completely 10000000000000% helped my anxiety and stress and best thing i ever did, haven't spoken to the piece of shit in about 5 years, and its wonderful.