Is it wrong to have friends younger or older then you??
My partner has a real problem with me being friends with a girl I work with that happens to be 10 years younger then me.
Now, we don't 'hang out' we've literally had coffee once, but I talk to her a lot, we don't when have snapchat so there's not even any secret messages, we have heaps in common and she's just a lovely person. She has her people she hangs out with and I spend time with my kids.
She works full time, has a partner, owns her car, trying to buy a house, doesn't drink or smoke, she's just a nice chick!
I think he's trying to isolate me?! Caus I'm not seeing a problem?!
Friends
Friends
Posted in:
Relationships & Marriage, Mental Health, Self Care
10 Replies
Absolutely not. We’re all adults, how boring to only be friends with someone exactly your own age.
I'm 33.
My best friend is in her late 40s, I'm friends with girls I work with who are in their early 20s and I have another very dear friend who is in her 70s. Age has absolutely no bearing on any of those friendships.
He has no valid reason to have a problem with this. His issue is probably more that you've found a confidant - that scares insecure men.
So what are ppl who don't work, smoke, drink or have a car loan?
I guess that's how you value ppl, each to their own,.
Ever heard the term unconscious bias?
I really think she was just trying to point out that this girl isn't a wild child who might try to influence OP to go out & get shitfaced every weekend & neglect her kids & hubby.
OP's just saying that this is a normal woman, not a bad influence.
Nah, if that were the case, she wouldn't mention owns her own car, looking to buy a house.
And she would have said doesn't do drugs as well.
You're an arsehole.... took me 15 fucking years to leave him and it only happened when police removed me and the kids. I was looking for help not your judgement on how I described a friend or what I was guessing what his problem with her was. Sounds like you're own insecurities at play here, so thanks for your extremely unhelpful. comment. Hope you're more helpful next time someone reaches out for help or you could try not saying anything anything at all while hiding behind your annon status. Congratulations, you're a c#$t...
If he finds reasons to try and stop all your friendships forming or ones that you might want to go out to see alone, then it's isolation.
If it's just this particular friend then maybe he has an age insecurity (his own) or is thinking you'll try to act ten years younger (clubs etc.).
Just ask exactly what his issue is. If he can't give you a good reason then make it clear you won't stop seeing her.
Do you have any other friends? If yes, how is he with them?
If no, think hard about why not. Did you have friends before he came along, and he's isolated you during all these years?
I have one friend that my partner doesn't like because of things he's heard about her (which are true, but that has nothing to do with me) - but I have numerous other friends that he does like and encourages me to go hang out with.
You saying "I think he's trying to isolate me" - if you think that, then there's your answer already. It's obviously on your mind.
If I were you, this is a hill I'd die on. I'd actually ramp it up, and start hanging out with her more often if physically possible - because if your husband is isolating you, you have to push back & break that hold. And make it clear to him that he will not control what you do & who you see.
Sounds insecure as hell.
Also, if it's just this friend, why this particular friend? What about her makes him so against you having a friendship? I might be paranoid but that skeptic in me wonders if he fancies her or something like that.
Whatever it is, it's weird behaviour and it ain't cool.
Nope, sounds like a him problem. What exactly is his issue??