My partner gambles. He is on the self exclusion register but still finds ways to gamble. He knows he has a problem but can’t stop. I don’t know what to do next.
My partner gambles. He is on the self exclusion register but still finds ways to gamble. He knows he has a problem but can’t stop. I don’t know what to do next.
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7 Replies
I'd end a relationship with a gambling addict. I couldn't deal with knowing that everything I worked hard for was always at risk of being taken away. The only thing you can do is protect yourself
I grew up with one. 0/10 do not recommend!
Fucked up our lives pretty badly and my mother never really recovered from the financial ruin my father created.
Your next step really needs to be seeking legal and financial advice. You need to protect yourself!
I lived with this and he put it before us in every single thing he did. He did not care if we ate or had fuel in the car. It gradually worsened over time. I got away. I would not drag it out and give him an ultimatum to seek help or your out and be prepared to follow through! If he refuses or you are too scared to give him the ultimatum, you need to make some decisions about how long you are prepared to live with this, as he has no motivation to change.
Not gambling, but my sister's partner is a drunk. He needs a support group, a Sponcer. You need to manage his money, giving him an allowance weekly. He needs councling, seperatly and together.
Always remember, you cannot fix him, he has to want to fix himself. And feeling sorry for him is not enough of a reason to stay. Always remember the cost noone speaks about.. to yourself and your children. Sometimes you need to put yourselves first because he will not! It is not your responsibility to fix him and sometimes staying is allowing him to continue being broken. Rock bottom is sometimes needed. Ask yourself the hard questions e.g. is staying enabling. Xx
Gambling is an addiction, like any other and they can’t stop unless they REALLY want to and get a lot of help. Honestly your only option is to kick him out and then there’s a small chance that might give him the motivation to get help. Addiction is a disease and no matter how much he loves you and the kids it will control him so you have to accept that and walk away before you hate him
Ps. Been there, tried to get him to stop for years and in the end we split up and now coparent and get along great. I don’t worry about him spending our bill money and he can do what he chooses!