I am a single working my whom came from a pretty rough start as far as parents go. And I would have appreciated someone to help me in any form.. I have two kids and I've been happily separated from my ex husband for 4 years and recently a friend insisted taking on her sons friend from interstate , unfortunately this friend has bi polar and two teenagers of her own . This kid now 16 has been in foster care since birth then at the age of 12 he found his dad who was a chronic alcoholic and things didn't work out which sent him back to the streets .. I now have this kid in my care and he's a good kid at heart !! I would take him in A) if I had room B) if I didn't have two young girls aged 7,8 .. All of the above is workable .. But I worry about taking in a 16 y/o boy with two girls .. What do you all think?
2 Replies
Okay i'm thinking you either A) don't do it (unfortunately i've heard way way too many stories about taking in older boys and them sexually abusing the younger girls that are in the house) or B) take him in but set a lot of rules about whats appropriate (no walking around in undies, locking bathroom and bedroom doors at night, not spending too much time alone together) & making sure you are very clear to your daughters what is okay and what isn't okay behaviour from him.
how much do you trust him? you said hes a good kid at heart, so what is your gut instinct telling you? jus because hes a boy doesnt mean he is going to be a molester.
how is he around your girls now? do they like him?
if all the above is answered positively then let him stay, but dont put your girls in a position where they are vulnurable, ie, dont leave him to babysit regularly, dont put him in charge of the girls.
you do need to put your own kids first, but if its going to be a positive thing for him as well as your girls then go for it