I need some legal and helpful advice please regarding where we stand in a fencing issue.
Not anything that is fuelling the upset that we are currently feeling.
EDIT
(As a “sisterhood community” I ask for support because I am at my wits end with these neighbours, yet I receive some comments here on this matter that have been so unhelpful).
I would love to hear from people who have experienced this and were able to manage without spending on legal action/costs as we are not in a financial position to spend anything.
We reside in the eastern suburbs of Melbourne (Victoria), and have neighbours who have been renovating their property for the past 6 or so months. Just to add they only come to us when they want something.
They took my husband around to the section of fence that divides our property where there is a rotting stump. The fence overall is very secure and does not move at all, where metal stakes have been put in place along the fence line to secure its position.
The neighbour wants us to pay half for the standard cost (which I understand is normal standard process) while he and the partner pays for the extra height to make 2 metres.
The costs would be around $3.5K which we just don’t have as we’re currently doing it hard where I had to change my role to meet some significant changes in the family over the past few years. The impact of covid on Victoria changed a lot for my family where costs are getting harder to meet.
The way he is, I would not be surprised if he pushed harder with a legal letter to force action. He is loaded and wouldn’t care about needing to do this to achieve what he wants if it sent us bankrupted or we lost our home.
My husband is reasonable and would accept where things would need to be done, stating that the he doesn’t believe the fence requires urgent “replacement”.
However the neighbour wants it all done to complete their plan to have all parts of the property up to his standard.
These neighbours do not have their own family and inherited their beautiful home so I’m feeling at a loss on where we stand.
In no way do we want them to know our circumstances although they know we can’t foot the bill for at least a year due to other expenses.
The neighbour has also been very clear about not caring about his treatment of us and how we feel.
I have no desire to be friends with them but just having a respectful relationship isn’t much to ask which he and his wife laughed at.
It speaks volumes and I wish some days we could move but we can’t.
80 Replies
Urgh I had a neighbour ask the same of me. I just refused and in the end he ended up paying for it as the fence wasn't bad enough for us to have to repair it at that stage.
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This guy would use the legal threat unfortunately. But either way we don’t have the funds for a lawyer, court costs or even to pay half for a fence.
So how do people in our situation get through this dilemma?
Plus the fence is not in dire straits to require replacement at this stage.
The neighbours just want it done in their time.
Might be different but I'm in QLD and he did get legal advice and it was determined the fence was not bad enough to have to repair it and I did not have to agree to pay anything. I didn't pay a cent.
It’s the sort of stress we don’t need right now.
But we do have images and a video of the solid position of the fence with the stakes for security, showing that urgent replacement is definitely not required.
I mean he is being quite reasonable though. I’m not sure why your upset.
3.5k on a rotten fence is not excessive and homes need to be maintained.
He would like a rotten piece of fence replaced… Your financial position is not known to him so I’m not sure why you’d expect him to show you any consideration. While I understand you want your financial privacy you can’t then turn around and judge him for being unaware of your circumstance.
I don’t know why it matters that they inherited the property or have no family.
The fence IS NOT rotten, only one part of a stump is. However the fence is held tight and doesn’t move because it was such a great job done some years ago.
As for asking for $3.5K, I made it clear in the post that we CANNOT pay this amount. AT ALL. Unless you can put the money into the account thank you!
I would prefer advice that is going to be HELPFUL and not stir a person who is seeking genuine request for advice.
Honestly READ THE POST!!
Read my other responses if you care to know. But I would rather you move on if you’re going to add fuel to the fire as I am asking for helpful advice.
Please move on…. 🤯🖐🏼
After reading your comments, I suspect you would look for ways not to pay even if you could afford it.
Your resentment of this “childless” couple and their financial position is clouding your judgement.
Clearly you haven’t read what I wrote.
If we could pay, we would.
But our priorities lie with our family and immediate bills so we don’t lose our livelihood.
If anything I would move.
What do you mean by they don't have their own family?
I would just be honest about my current financial position, sorry, we can't afford it at the moment and it isn't urgent.
Maybe some time in the future, will let you know.
We have known this couple for several years, and they inherited the property from a delightful elderly relative who was the owner of the wider estate.
They choose to not have kids because they hate them and complain about the kids games and noise, and never return the kids toys that end up over their fence. Instead they leave their dog to destroy them for the kids to see and cry about, then coldly remark “I don’t care!”
So they’re quite a bitter nasty couple, I’m sure only around late 40’s to 50’s. It’s shocking and quite a sad way to live.
It would be a couple of years before we could pay to be honest but this guy wants it to be very soon.
You know people can not have kids and live a fulfilled life, who are you to judge?
I tell you what would get old with me, shit coming over the fence due to kids.
I would never allow my kids to fling toys into the neighbour's yard, how dare they.
The odd ball, but toys, that's feral family territory if you think that's acceptable.
My parents lived next to a commission house and that's the kind of crap they dealt with.
Control your kids and they might be nicer to you.
And the inheritance is none of your business, you sound jealous.
Are you serious?? They are kids playing ball games.
Talk about unrealistic expectations of kids. They’re not “flinging” items for the fun of it.
They’re great kids but kids will be loud and excitable and accidentally kick or throw balls - like we did as kids. But we always got our balls back.
It sounds like you’re just disgruntled and need to scroll on. And you probably need more as well… and not getting it..
Like I said… scroll on because you ain’t helping. There always has to be a nasty one to upset the apple cart. 👎🏻
This is about your PRIDE.
You don't want to tell them you don't have the funds available.
If you were just honest with them, something could be worked out (like paying a bit each week).
But your pride and need to look good is stopping that.
Move along. I asked tor helpful advice. 🖐🏼
You are a feral creature to imply my kids match your style.
It’s people like you who pass judgment on families when you’re deeply bitter and twisted in your mindset. FO.
Gee I can't imagine why you would have issues with your neighbours lol
Maybe call legal aid?
In Victoria, there is a thing called the fencing act (including dispute resolution), you can access via this website:
https://www.justice.vic.gov.au/fencing-law-in-victoria#:~:text=The%20Fen...
There is a free tribunal that handles disputes, you don't have to pay anything.
Are you talking about VCAT?
Thank you. Only a few decent people have actually offered reasonable advice.
We have been mortgage payers for several years but the impact of covid changed a lot for us, and include the increase in the cost of living. And I had a ridiculous comment made - NO DECENT SUGGESTIONS that why own a house if we can’t put money towards repairs - and they suggested we rented.
I can’t understand what a ludicrous suggestion.
We are living pay by pay - paying the mortgage and unfortunately the cost of the fence is something we can’t foot. Prioritising our expenses is what we have had to do and replacing the fence is definitely not required right now.
If people would understand that these neighbours are loaded and want everything done in THEIR time regardless if it sends us bankrupted.
We are struggling right now and all I need are helpful suggestions from the public.
So thank you for putting the time in to offer decent advice.
That’s on my list of things to do.
Thank you. Only a few decent people have actually offered reasonable advice.
We have been mortgage payers for several years but the impact of covid changed a lot for us, and include the increase in the cost of living. And I had a ridiculous comment made - NO DECENT SUGGESTIONS that why own a house if we can’t put money towards repairs - and they suggested we rented.
I can’t understand what a ludicrous suggestion.
We are living pay by pay - paying the mortgage and unfortunately the cost of the fence is something we can’t foot. Prioritising our expenses is what we have had to do and replacing the fence is definitely not required right now.
If people would understand that these neighbours are loaded and want everything done in THEIR time regardless if it sends us bankrupted.
We are struggling right now and all I need are helpful suggestions from the public.
So thank you for putting the time in to offer decent advice.
They are insular and nasty. We have always been kind and considerate, and even our kids demonstrate respect
despite being loud as kids will be from time to time.
Snide comments from a trolling B who chooses to upset and isn’t offering help needs to scroll on because your day for someone to add fuel to your struggle with come.
Well I'm the B who had a go at you and the same B who gave you all the info.
Then why didn’t you simply bypass the inflammatory thoughts (not putting them in the comments) and just going straight to the helpful advice to begin with? 🤦🏽♀️
We replaced our fences, and put fences where there were no fences, a few years ago. On one side is an aged pensioner, no way we were asking her to pay half. On the other side is a disability pensioner, again, no way would we expect him to pay. He did insist on paying it off, so I just didn't give him the bank details. He gives us veggies and seeds from his garden.
We told them it was going up to check they were OK with it but didn't give them the plans for the fences, we chose a colour that suits our house and it's the height we wanted it to be.
If we didn't already know they were both pensioners? It was 17 grand, of course we'd have loved for some of that to be shared! Circumstances just didn't support that. Even though it's technically improved their land value, it's only one side of each of their fences and ours is now fully fenced.
You don't have to lay bare the budget, just that you can't source the money yet and ask if you can revisit in a year.
Do bear in mind prices will only keep going up. If they won't foot the whole bill, and say they'll wait don't take that to mean you can rest on your laurels. Take that time to figure out how to make it happen.
Thanks. That’s helpful advice:
I just wanted to another thank you. Only a few decent people have actually offered reasonable advice.
We have been mortgage payers for several years but the impact of covid changed a lot for us, and include the increase in the cost of living. And I had a ridiculous comment made - NO DECENT SUGGESTIONS that why own a house if we can’t put money towards repairs - and they suggested we rented.
I can’t understand what a ludicrous suggestion.
We are living pay by pay - paying the mortgage and unfortunately the cost of the fence is something we can’t foot. Prioritising our expenses is what we have had to do and replacing the fence is definitely not required right now.
If people would understand that these neighbours are loaded and want everything done in THEIR time regardless if it sends us bankrupted.
We are struggling right now and all I need are helpful suggestions from the public.
So thank you for putting the time in to offer decent advice.
I replied helpfully and you've not even acknowledged my answer, dare I say even more helpful than this as I've told you where to go to get the actual information for your area. Councils have clear rules for fencing because it is the number one complaint they have. Start with your local council as every area has slightly different laws. If you ignored the negative comments and only replied to the helpful ones you wouldn't have it up to 46 comments right now
Actually I have appreciated all the suggestions and in no way did I intend to not respond to all. I can’t sit with the phone / computer responding to all when I have chronically unwell family I am supporting. I’m also compromised at the moment while still needing to meet many responsibilities. So my apologies for not responding.
The fact I was unnecessarily hassled by certain people who know nothing about the difficulties we have faced with these awful neighbours took a lot out of me.
All I was asking was supportive advice - not to be criticised for paying a mortgage and suddenly finances have slipped from beneath us where we are living borderline , so even paying unnecessarily for a new fence would be completely irresponsible of us.
Speak to your local council or look on their website to see what the laws are for fencing. Usually you don't have to if the fence is in good condition. We know of someone who deliberately damaged their fence after a storm because they wanted a new one. Just be honest with them about not being able to afford it and you would rather wait for it to be damaged naturally so you can claim it on insurance.
The council is on my list and legal aid. As for the natural damage to the fence, I think this may be why the neighbour didn’t put anything in to support the rotting stump.
You need to know the laws. It sounds like a really good deal they’re offering. Higher fences would probably make you both happier and they’re paying for it.
You have to pay the difference if you want something other than standard fencing, so they're not really offering a good deal it's just the law. If I wanted to replace my colourbond fence with a brick wall it would be really expensive but my neighbours would only need to pay half of what a colourbond fence would cost. And they might not even have to pay that if there was nothing wrong with the fence in the first place.
Yes the difference has been outlined which is only about a couple of hundred dollars.
But I am asking for advice from those who have faced a similar situation and struggled to meet the costs.
Actually higher fences are known to attract criminals more for break ins as it's harder for others outside to notice them.
Be that as it may, doesn't sound like these 2 neighbouring families would be looking out for each other anyway.
We did look out for them on several occasions with a response of shunning.
I am still respectful when we are outside in the late evenings too. No slamming car doors, keeping the kids quiet, dimming the lights when we approach their property from the front; dropping off mail in their letterbox etc… we do all of this but are still treated like crap.
It’s not the higher fence that is the issue here.
I think, you could easily find out the law and organise this, you’re writing here for a bitch and all of these reasons are not the actual reason. High fence is more dangerous bs. Stop being so negative as it makes it extremely hard when two parties have to work together. They’ve made a very decent offer, if you can’t be civil and try to work towards meeting them somewhere for your own fence line, just stick to the facts and the legalities.
The fact is the fence does not need replacing and we don’t have the money to pay if we were served a legal letter to do so.
My post wasn’t about bitching but wanting to know what others have experienced- so all I can say is you need to butt out if you just can’t offer and supportive advice.
I know of certain websites but wanted to know if there more options.
So just remember that if you ever choose to ask for help and you have feral trolls trying to make your day worse, remember how I felt. 🖐🏼👎🏻
Ring your local area free legal hotline. They can give your really good advice on this issue.
I don’t know where you live so unfortunately you are going to have to google the number yourself.
Thank you. Only a few decent people have actually offered reasonable advice.
We have been mortgage payers for several years but the impact of covid changed a lot for us, and include the increase in the cost of living. And I had a ridiculous comment made - NO DECENT SUGGESTIONS that why own a house if we can’t put money towards repairs - and they suggested we rented.
I can’t understand what a ludicrous suggestion.
We are living pay by pay - paying the mortgage and unfortunately the cost of the fence is something we can’t foot. Prioritising our expenses is what we have had to do and replacing the fence is definitely not required right now.
If people would understand that these neighbours are loaded and want everything done in THEIR time regardless if it sends us bankrupted.
We are struggling right now and all I need are helpful suggestions from the public.
So thank you for putting the time in to offer decent advice.
Who cares if they're fucking loaded you stinge, YOU bought a mortgage so repairs are YOURS too ! They don't owe you a charity break. If you have an issue, go to Court! You already have all your own answers, you argumentative tight arse . Can't afford a home and it's accompanying expenses? Sell it!!
That's a bit over the top. OP doesn't need to pay for a fence if it's in good repair, the neighbours are being unreasonable. Why would you pay for a fence anyway? We have had fence damage twice in the last 15 years and insurance has always covered it. Why would you pay for a fence to be replaced if it wasn't damaged? I wouldn't. I'm not sure why you think that cost should be considered in normal house maintenance.
Clearly stated that the fence is held up by stakes in part. So there is structural issues with fence requiring external support.
The stakes were added for extra support as part of necessary repairs to prevent issues.
A few had been added when the fence had been holding up well.
So it still doesn’t indicate immediate replacement. The neighbour didn’t bother doing anything whereas all the effort has been from our end.
Thank you so much for pointing this out. So much of what I explained went over so many awful heads and I was so fed up trying to explain “offer decent advice or just scroll on!”
I have explained how it’s far from necessary but all these troll remarks showed how they can’t read what is there or they think because we’re home owners - well mortgage payers, that we should therefore have an abundance to pay unnecessarily for a new fence.
Our neighbours are pushing to have all things in place to suit them. There’s no interest in what we would like and it has been this way for many years. They treat us like vermin, never return our kids belongings that accidentally end up over the fence, and yet they will tell us when they want things.
If we could move, we would.
Thanks again for your support.
The IM community is made up of all sorts but asking some of these questions AND reading some of the vicious responses can bring out the ugly in us all.
I was clearly triggered by the ignorant heartless troll like attitude and remarks and bit back.