Pre-teen girl and sex.

Anonymous

Pre-teen girl and sex.

So, I thought I was pretty good at keeping tabs on my almost 11 year old daughter and her iPad/internet use.
She is allowed to have Instagram provided I check who is on her followers list and I have her password much to her pre-teen disgust. That's as far as I will let her go in terms of social media use.

She has this app which all the kids at school use and I thought it was quite harmless as when you are
Chatting with friends it won't even let you type certain words, such as body parts to stop sexual predators I guess.

Any way, she has somehow unblocked the restrictions on safari and has been looking at YouTube videos. (Was previously blocked) and after an argument tonight where I told her she is not taking the iPad to bed, she 'hid' it and was all secretive. Started on a rant as pre-teen, hormonal girls do and stormed off.

I found the iPad and searched her history and see that she has gone on YouTube,Searched this app and looked at sexual things that can be done in terms of manipulating the game to enable the characters to have sex and get nude etc..... Now I know it's only natural for her to be inquisitive. But I don't know how to approach the subject with her.

I have emailed the makers of this game, think of it as a kids version of the sims.

I am going to purchase a book for her to read on the subject of where babies come from.

I just also don't know what to do in terms of her friends that play this game. Do I tell the parents, just as a heads up or leave it. I would want to know if there is a way this game could be manipulated.

I really don't know what I'm asking as I thought I'd have at least a year before sex came up with my girl.

Please no hate on the iPad etc, she is only allowed on for an hour a night in the lounge room but with headphones.

Posted in:  Behaviour, Kids, Teenagers, Dating & Sex, Puberty

2 Replies

Anonymous

Not hating on the ipad, I think you've done well restricting pages, not every parent would do this or for that matter know that this was even possible . . .But if she's smart enough to unblock restricted settings on the Ipad (she'll probably do it again according to stereotypical pre-teen/teens, I'm dreading this stage myself), maybe try a Cybersafe247 modem, you can from what I've heard, set the times that she's allowed to access the internet, and what sites she can access, and I believe you can track her history from your computer, she cant over ride the settings from her Ipad as this must be done via the "administrator". This may help put your mind at rest for the future. Parenting kids these days is so much different as a lot of us never had the internet growing up, so its un chartered territory when trying to teach Cyber safety. Well done you for keeping an eye on what she's been doing.

Might I suggest instead of a book of where babies come from, you find a website (of course you check it out first), if she's already doing searches on this "sort of thing" this way may relate better than a book? I don't know your child but its another option for you to consider.

I would bring the game up with the parents you know, as they maybe un aware of this aspect of the game, what they do with the info is up to them. I guess I'm lucky that my son likes me to "watch" him play his Ipad games, as boring as Lego Stat Wars is lol

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Anonymous

The worst i had access to at that age was looking up dirty words in the dictionary! kids her age will be curious and yes I was at 10 (30 years ago) discussing sex. Of course we didn't really understand it just totally curious, BUT nobody was ready to act on that curiosity with a boy, with germs. I remember a group of my friends and I thought it was hysterical to swap dirty jokes, most of which we didn't really understand.

Maybe have a chat to her about any questions she has regarding sex and anything she has seen or read that she might have questions about.

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